A Broken Lord and his Torn Miko
by angelofgodsgrace
Summary: Sesshomarus heart is broken and tormented by his one true love. After the hurt, Sesshomaru then turns into the cold youkai we all know but someone has fallen for him-Kagome. Will he ever find love again? Or will he refuse to let Kagome in? Sess/Kag
1. Prologue

My first Sesshomaru and Kagome pairing

Sess/Kag pairing! Boo ya!

Sesshomarus heart is broken and tormented by his one true love. After the hurt, Sesshomaru then turns into the cold youkai we all know but someone has fallen for him-Kagome. Will he ever find love again? Or will he refuse to let Kagome in?

We will find out.

(Inspired by: The Legend of the Black Scorpion. WATCH IT!)

I got my idea from this movie, but it's not the exact same thing. I put other stuff in there but mostly based on this movie. You will know what I mean if you watch the movie. This movie is what inspired me to make this fic.

My first Sesshomaru and Kagome pairing and 2nd story ever. Whoa this is going to be a bumpy road. Sesshomaru is kind of hard to characterize but I will try my best at it.

Disclaimer: Do not own anything of Inuyasha…Not any of it belongs to me.

Rins age: 16

Prologue

"Sesshomaru-sama, wait for me!" Rin whined trailing behind me. I didn't even bother to look. I just continued my usual daily walk around the palace. I loved nature. It was always so tranquil and beautiful and never failed to calm me. Just like the love of my life that seemed to always stray behind me. Sooner or later she would catch up and every time, embrace me in her arms and say with the biggest smile on her face…

"My Lord I have missed you." She looked up at me; her deep brown eyes always drew me in no matter what. I was always amazed by this trance she had over me. How did she do it? Where did she learn this ability? Surely this person is a master of hypnotism. If this man or woman exists, I would surely learn from them so that I could daze Rin also-into becoming my mate some day.

I smiled back, hardly; but nonetheless it was a smile, for her. Even though she is my friend and I watched her grow from a child to a woman, she is my dearest love and I cherish her. So what if she wasn't royalty. It did not matter. Being the heir to my lands was just a title to me-nothing more.

"Why are you always so serious? Won't you let me in past those cold exteriors one day?" she teased and tip-toed to kiss me lightly. I said nothing but my heart had whispered, _'One day Rin…there will be no more hesitations the moment you are my __wife…'_

* * *

The day my mother died was when the walls sealed away my heart. Now that Rin was in my life the walls had began to crumble. I knew Rin had feelings for me, ever since she was eight, but she managed to pass through the walls barricading my heart. How did she enter? Maybe it was the time of our first kiss not too long ago…in the gardens behind the palace…

"Rin."

My idiotic half brother-Inuyasha-why did he suddenly decide to show up when I was always alone with Rin? "My Lord." She bowed respectfully and he blushed making my jealousy crawl underneath my skin. It wasn't enough that he already annoyed me past the extent of killing, but torturous. Even a fool could see that he had feelings for Rin. The very thought made my blood boil.

"Rin I told you about that…just call me Inuyasha." She giggled and my temper increased. "Why are you here Inuyasha?" His face was solemn now. "Father wishes an audience with Rin…alone."

Should I be worried? I didn't know, but by the looks of it Inuyasha did and a sudden feeling overcame me. Yeah, I was worried.

Rin was also worried. All of us oblivious as to what was going on. Her radiant smile vanishing. "Oh…okay."

* * *

Inuyasha and I waited outside of the doors anxiously. Of course Inuyasha was pacing back and forth like an imbecile while I waited frantically for her return. "What do you think he's going to say? What if she did something she didn't know and he wants to punish her for it?" He rambled on with ridiculous situations that would end up in Rin's death or exile and I closed my eyes to try and drain out his irritating voice.

I couldn't help but think worst case scenarios as well, and my hand couldn't restrain from tapping rapidly on the marble pillar I was leaning on. I could just hope…

* * *

Are you astonished that I have hope? Yeah I am too.

I guess love can do that to you. Rin had changed me. The last time I even thought of hope was when my mother was sickly and dying in her bed. I hoped and prayed that she would be ok and live-but the odds were always against me. Never had a prayer or a single thread of hope creep into my mind since that unforgettable day.

* * *

My ears twitched at the light, steady footsteps that approached the doors. It was as if the person were hesitating to open the doors. No doubt it was Rin. Something had gone terribly wrong.

The door had finally opened and her eyes were covered by her bangs. Inuyasha and I stared at her and it was obvious as to what our questions were.

"I am to marry…your father." she mumbled.

I didn't know whether to cry or to be enraged. All these emotions had filled me and I didn't feel quite right. My stomach was in a knot, my head was suddenly heavy and my heart was beating loudly in my ears.

Inuyasha was no doubt vocal. "What?! No…this is a mistake Rin. This is a mistake. Maybe he meant-""He didn't." she mumbled again. Knowing my father, she had no say in the matter. Whatever my father desired, he would have. A simple and pathetic example resulted in the birth of Inuyasha.

"Rin…I…I can't believe...-but why? Did he say?" a tear escaped her eye and cascaded down her cheek. She shook with resentment and fury. "He said he wants to marry me because he is searching for love and he said he sees it in me. That's why Inuyasha."

I was still silent-unable to speak. My father would be hearing from me surely. Just because Inuyashas mother was dead did not mean he should take my future wife.

* * *

I charged in the room where my father resided and he didn't even look at me. "My son…why are you-""Don't pretend to be ignorant! You know why I am here!"

He still did not make eye contact with me which annoyed me even more. He was going to look at me if I had to **make** him. "She is now sixteen, and entered womanhood so what is the matter? What concern is it of yours? You like her yes I know that, but is she yours?"" I don't like her-I love her!" Now he had turned around to look at me. That was one goal accomplished.

"I chose her specifically for that reason. She would be a good mother to our nation. She just has that charm-where ever she goes people are entranced by her. She is a genuine jewel-""She is not just some object! She is a woman!"

My father shook his head. "Sesshomaru…one day you will understand." With that said he turned away from me to walk away and I withdrew Tokijin from its sheath. I was not going to lose another person in my life that meant so much to me. Not this time.

He stopped in his tracks and I pointed the sword at him to fight.

"My poor son…you are still so young. I will give you anything you want besides what we just discussed."

Did he pity me?! No…I, Lord Sesshomaru, heir to the throne did not accept pity-and never will.

I put Tokijin back in its sheath and left without a word. I did not want anything from him. He was no longer a father to me. He was nothing-less than nothing. He did not exist. One day his life would be in my grasp, and I wouldn't even hesitate to crush him. One day…

* * *

5 years later…

"Sesshomaru, Lord of the West, heir to the throne, we come with dreadful news from the queen of the west Rin." My jaw locked. I had not heard her name for five years…It displeased me. The messenger went on. "Your father, Inu No Taisho died at war. Since you are his eldest son, you would be the rightful successor. Please come to the palace this afternoon, take your place at the throne and resume your duty bestowed to you from birth."

How dare she ask me such a thing! I would never go back to that place unless it was _**absolutely **_necessary. This was a stupid coincidence. I know my father did not die in a war-he was murdered. The culprit who did…let's just say it wouldn't be pleasant if I had met up with him because he had taken his life when I could not. Obviously it was a strong demon…and a close friend to him.

"My Lord," he bowed respectfully. "She would be most grateful if you could make it."

I was not going. I wanted to ignore this messenger and kill him in an instant but why would I waste my time? Why was this messenger wasting my time? Within a split moment his head came clean off and spun to the ground.

I guess that wasn't too wasteful of my time.

After all the messengers she has sent me the first year, you would think she would stop sending them when they wouldn't return. She stopped after a whole year of messengers dead, but now this…did she think it would change? The messenger had posed too many questions to linger in my head which made me angry. The only way to find out was to go-and I was not going.

* * *

Back at the Palace…

"Rin, Sesshomaru is not coming." "He will come." "I know my brother-he will not come." "You will see Inuyasha…Sesshomaru will come-""And when he doesn't, I will be the successor to the throne."

My mistress had gasped. Being her best maid had its ups-but at times like this it definitely had its downs. "Inuyasha…it is your brothers right to the throne." "And if he denies it?" he inquired as she balled her hands into fists.

She had sat herself down by the pond in her room in pure grief. My queen Rin told many stories to me about her love, her story of the demon I had never seen.

Inuyasha had followed her closely and kneeled behind her putting his hands on her shoulder. Her face grimaced in disgust by his touch. I hated whenever Inuyasha was around my queen Rin. Not only did he rape her when his father was never around and dealing with war affairs, he was a murderer. Everyone knew he had killed his father-but no one had proof and without proof and without our rightful Lord Sesshomaru…Inuyasha was unfortunately in charge-for now.

I feared Inuyashas words and I could tell Rin did also. If Sesshomaru did not return and take his place on the throne-that would only mean Inuyasha would be the Lord of the West.

The thought made me shiver.

Hopefully this…Sesshomaru would return. He had to at least be a better choice than Inuyasha.

"Inuyasha please…" she pleaded. His hands roamed her body freely. His eyes were hungry and lustful. How could our Lord of only twenty three years of age, violate our queen?

"Once I am the Lord of the West, you will take your place by my side." He growled. "No more will we have to hide our love." He kissed her gently. It actually looked sincere. "Sesshomaru will return." She sternly murmered. His face snarled and he gripped her chin viciously. "Not unless he's dead."

He threw her to the floor and stormed out the room. She did not move and I ran to her side. "My Lady…" "I'm fine Kagome." Her voice was broken. "I wish this love of yours you speak of returns…maybe then everything will turn out for the better." She made no sound but her tears rolled down her cheeks in streams. "If my love does not return-I will have no choice but to marry Inuyasha."

I was astounded that she would say that. She didn't have a choice back then to marry Lord Inu No Taisho-but this time she at least had some chance, if Sesshomaru returned. Why would she want to marry someone like Inuyasha?

"But my Lady…" "It's not what you think. I will never love Inuyasha and I don't plan on it ever." I held my tongue for a moment and just couldn't contain myself. "Why?" she smiled and no longer was it radiant and joyful. It was sinister and evil.

"Innocent Kagome-are you really so naïve?" Her laugh made me feel small and nervous. Maybe the years of being with a man she didn't love who would bed her whenever he pleased, and his son also taking her to bed when he was gone, had done something to her.

"I will be the sweet, adoring, young wife. I will take care of him, please him when he wants and when he finally turns his back…" she grinned, taking a short sword and with great speed, threw it at the painting of Inuyashas face. "I will never have him touch me again!"

* * *

Back to the middle of nowhere…

I continued my day walking wherever my legs took me. Maybe I would go and visit the only one and true friend I had that wasn't too far from here. I would talk with Jaken only for a little and then take my leave. Now that they knew of my location-I didn't want them knowing where Jaken resided.

When I reached Jakens home, it reeked of blood and death. I made my way through his broken home to see him and some youkai soldiers of the West dead. I was not an idiot as to why they did this, but I was an idiot to not see it before. "Inuyasha."

I unsheathed my Tensaiga and intended to resurrect Jaken from the dead. I know he could only be rescued once, but at least he was loyal and truthful-The only two things that I respect. I also wanted to be reassured that it was my pitiful half brother that was behind this.

I could see the demons from the underworld, ready to take him. With one wave of my forsaken blade, he arose and cried gratefully, "My Lord, you have saved me!"

Regretfully he was still annoying, but he stopped his parade at once when I cast him my glare. "You probably already know…but your brother did this."

That was all I needed to know. He had sent for them to kill me, now that father is dead. No doubt he was the murderer, and I couldn't withhold the fury that had been bottled up for the past five years I had been gone. I made it my solemn duty to make Inuyasha **suffer **at all costs.

* * *

This was a good enough reason to return to the palace. I was no fool. I wasn't going to finish Inuyasha immediately when I got there-no I will slowly…and painfully torture him. I will strip everything of him and leave him with nothing…then end his pathetic hanyou life.

* * *

I hid my scent and covered myself in a dark robe so no one would recognize me. I entered my Kingdom and no one had even cast a single glance at me. I liked it this way.

"All hail the new Lord of the West Inuyasha!" people were yelling and chanting everywhere for my half brother…it was degrading. I wanted to kill everyone around me.

I looked up to see Inuyasha sitting on the throne as if he was high and mighty. My eyebrows furrowed. It would only make my victory much sweeter and much more pleasant when I see the horrid look on his face before I relieve him of his wretched life.

I was eased down by my thoughts of Inuyasha suffering until **she** came out.

"All hail Queen Rin!" She took her place at his side and held his hand in hers.

I then imagined how great they would look together with their beautiful garments soaked in their own blood.

* * *

I stayed at Jakens place within the Kingdom and he accompanied me. My childhood memories replayed me as a young pup running through his house and him chasing right after me. I remember how he rushed to contain me, to keep me from "injuring" myself. Even as a young child I feared nothing.

For some apparent reason my memories liked to replay themselves. Only fools dwelled in the past.

"I never could get rid of this house. It holds too many memories…" As if reading my mind Jaken smiled.

"I was weak then-and now I am stronger. Looking back is a waste of time."

Jaken frowned. "My Lord…what do you plan to do now that Inuyasha and Rin are married?"

'_So she has married my brother now…the half breed.' _Pain tugged at my heart but I shunned it away into the crater in my soul. _'She didn't even wait for me…'_ If there was one thing I truly hated, it was lies. If so…then why was I lying to myself?

I was not going to admit my jealousy. I was NOT jealous. "I will simply congratulate her."

* * *

I had made my way to the palace like the wind once the sky turned dark. I had my scent covered to look for anything useful in Rins room. After five years, I would return to the place I loathed the most…

If I was correct, and I was always correct, the balcony I was on was the balcony leading to my mothers' bedroom which Rin resided in. I had quietly walked into the elegant room and again memories flooded my brain.

'_Sesshomaru my beautiful son-do not cry. I always want to see that gorgeous smile on your face.'_ I was sniffling like a baby at my mothers' side, holding her hand. I was four…and acting like a newborn pup. That was the last time I ever pleaded for anything. _'Please mother, do not die…'_

I closed my eyes to rid the memory. '_How could I have been so weak?'_ I thought to myself when I heard a quick breath intake from behind me.

* * *

A woman of about twenty, hair darker than the ravens' feathers, eyes more blue than the sky, and lips more crimson than blood. The immediate second she breathed I had closed her mouth to hush any plea or cry she would make. "If you value your life, do not speak a word of my presence."

Her eyes widened and sparkled in the piercing moonlight with rage. I sensed no fear in her entire being. Only shock and anger which surprised **me**. I carefully examined her. This woman was not only Rins maiden…she was a miko..

I removed my hand from her mouth and she glowered at me intensely. "I see it runs in the family to kill and even bring you so low as to hurt a woman my lord."

This woman was clever. She knew exactly who I was-but to compare me to my family was a death wish. "Do not compare me with those wretched fools. My father was a selfish and overpowering demon who got what he deserved. As for Inuyasha, he is a half breed brat who strives for power because he has none."

"I do not wish for Inuyashas death the way you do-I just wish he would go back to the way he was-a gentle hanyou..." she shook her head. "I know you want him dead-but I cannot allow that. What I will let slip by is a lesson, and a hard one that you are sure to teach him."

This woman was smarter than she perceived to be, despite the obvious that I wanted my brother dead. Maybe I was giving her too much credit-with a single sniff I could tell this woman had relations with Inuyasha not too long ago. Maybe about three years ago was the last time she had relations with him. She wasn't that hard to read.

"You are the queens' maiden-are you not?" she nodded with a confused look. "Lord Sesshomaru…why do you not say my lady's name?" I simply ignored the pointless question.

"You know she still loves you-""Speak of it again and you will surely die where you stand." This human was different. I could've sworn I heard her growl at me.

"From the stories I've heard, you are completely opposite! Rin would always tell me her secrets and-"

I drained out the obnoxious noise coming from her mouth. She was starting to annoy me. I didn't remember humans being THIS irritating.

Wait. My brain had clicked. _'Secrets…Rins Secrets…'_

"and Rin is-""Silence woman. You will tell me what I need to know or else." "Or else what? You kill me and expose yourself? I don't think so. Come on Sesshomaru-sama I thought you were smarter than that. Besides, why don't you ask the queen herself-I bet she's dying to see you again-"

Her throat was now within my grip. I was merely holding her and she was gasping for air. It just reminded me of how inadequate and disgraceful humans were.

"Listen **girl**. I don't need you-I don't need anyone. I just want to make those who hurt me-suffer more than anyone could ever imagine. If you want to be another person who suffers I could arrange that easily." I tightened my grasp on her tiny neck and she wheezed. I finally decided my fun was over and dropped her to the floor.

"Go ahead my Lord…kill me. I am not afraid of dying." She boldly whispered. Her stare was seeping into my very spirit. Torturing this human would result in nothing because it seemed she greeted death with open arms. It seemed her and I had some things in common.

"Why would I kill you and give you what you want? I would much rather use you to my advantage in killing Inuyasha and you will tell me."

I could sense the queen approaching and decided to leave this conversation for later.

"I will contact you tomorrow night. Meet me in the gardens-same time."

I left in the blink of an eye…

* * *

"Uhh…uh-""Kagome what are you doing?" I turned to see Rin with a confused expression on her face. "Nothing my Lady…just…admiring the view." I trailed off gazing at the full moon.

Sesshomaru was not the kind of hero I was hoping for, but beggars can't be choosers. I didn't want Inuyasha dead…he still remained in a place at my heart even after all he has done, but he had to be taught a lesson.

Just maybe, maybe Sesshomaru won't kill him and Inuyasha will realize what he's done. Maybe he will go back to the sweet loving hanyou I always knew-not this monster that he has turned into for the past two years.

I wanted to smack myself. Why do I think he will change? Why is hope always toying with my heart?

"Kagome," I came back to my reality and she eyed me suspiciously. "What's wrong? Are you feeling okay?" I nodded. "Of course my Lady. I am just tired that's all."

I was still a little shaken up from my encounter with Sesshomaru-sama. I knew he wanted to kill me, but Rin said he despised fear and that he always thought it was for the weak. Hopefully I wasn't on his bad side-but then again he wanted to meet me tomorrow so I guess I passed. He may not know it, but I know him more than he knows me.

I had to admit I was shocked to see him. Why had he come through Rins room? Was he planning on meeting her? I guess I should plan on what we are going to talk about tomorrow. I didn't want to know what would happen to me if I didn't hold up my part of the bargain.

* * *

Damn it! If it wasn't for my accursed mind pulling at my past, I wouldn't have been distracted and not caught by a mortal!

Though it wasn't as bad as I thought…it was actually beneficiary.

The woman had no fear of me. Even when I grasped her throat she had no fear…or she hid it exceedingly well. At least she wasn't like everyone else, who cower in fear of a superior being. She had an attitude and pride-something that would surely get her into trouble no doubt.

I scoffed at myself. What was I saying? That was exactly what I had…

* * *

The next day I walked around a little to enjoy the nature around me and further my study on Inuyasha. At least the Kingdom was still beautiful. Not a cloud in sight and the sun was free to shine its light on earth.

I hated that I had to disguise myself, but I had no choice seeing as it would ruin my flawless plan. I walked around some more examining how much the Kingdom had changed-not appearance wise, but demon wise. It seemed like it was turning into a hanyou Kingdom. Now that my brother was a hanyou it seemed it wasn't a disgrace anymore. That would change the second I was in my throne…

Later on I decided to go back into the queens' room and get a better look around to check for anything to my advantage. Last time I went I was distracted. It would not happen this time.

I didn't even have to smell to know that Inuyasha had taken her to bed. I was close to vomiting but I was a Lord and I did not get sick like feeble humans, I did not throw up like a pitiful human either. I was Lord Sesshomaru.

It felt like it was taking me forever to find something of use but I found nothing. I cursed myself for coming in the first place. Why would she have anything valuable anyways? I turned to leave when I felt a loose decorative carving on the floor. I removed it to find a little compartment with a box inside.

Maybe I was wrong.

I opened the box to find…

A rose…

And not just any rose-this was the very first rose I gave to her…

I could do nothing but stare at it. My mind had started to reminisce again.

* * *

'_Oh my Lord…it is the most beautiful flower I have ever seen!'_ I blushed fervently…for the first time ever. _'Well I thought you would like it. Anything Sesshomaru has is only the best.' _She beamed, looking at the flower and gazing at it in amazement. Just the reaction I was wanting.

'_My Lord I will cherish this forever!'_

* * *

I didn't think she meant literally. If I am right, which I always am, this flower was at least thirteen years old. It wasn't as withered as I thought it would be. The flowers and plants we have are different because our land has a different soil. It would last longer than any human could tend to.

The rose was faded, barely existing. It was dead, but remained intact with itself. I found myself resenting this flower-but also relating to it.

I held it in my hand and it nearly disintegrated. I wanted to destroy this pathetic symbol of my affection to her, that ridiculous attempt of gaining **her **affection long ago, but found I couldn't.

I was going to allow it to live for now.

"Oh…my dear Sesshomaru-sama."

The last time I heard her call my name was when I was leaving to never return again. I did not want to look at her.

She approached me and I still did not want to give her the satisfaction of my acknowledgement.

"My Lord…how I longed for this day…" she whimpered, her arms falling around me. My mind was telling me to do nothing but my body did not listen. My arm had defied me and wrapped around her. I found this…quite comfortable…and unpleasant at the same time.

She held me tightly and shoved her lips onto mine. I pushed her off of me and she flew back onto her bed.

"I do not desire you, nor will I ever. You reek of my father and Inuyasha **woman**."

Tears ran down her face. "No my Lord-please listen to me! I never wanted to betray you! I never loved anyone else but you! You are the only one! I married Inuyasha because-"

"Do not waste your breath and my time with your petty excuses."

She barely contained herself. She was breathing rapidly.

"Sesshomaru-sama," she pleaded. "I love you-I'm still in love with you, and I will _**always**_ love you. Deep down I know you still love me…I know it!"

She still knew me even after my absence. "You unfaithful girl-go back to your husband."

She drew closer and tried again to embrace me. I grabbed her wrists, tiring of her confusing me with this affection. "Are you not married to my half brother? You cannot have us both."

"I only want you."

"Yet you have my brother."

I released her and started my leave when she fell to her knees in anguish. "NO! My Lord…I will not go to him! Please wait!"

My heart could no longer bare the torture. It took everything I had not to steal her away and have her for myself. It was time I left.

As much as it pained me I ignored her. My thoughts were racing in my head.

I felt absent from myself until I felt her lips on mine.

I was too into my thoughts to notice she had run in front of me to ridicule me with her embrace-to merely mock my feelings...

My body had disobeyed me again…

Only this time I grabbed her gently, and moved her away. I left without a single thought. I left before she could say anything and before I hesitated. I hated hesitations.

She knows my heart is weak…she knows the true me…and yet she uses it to her advantage.

* * *

The time to meet the miko was upon me. When I got there she was nowhere to be found. I could already sense she was inside the palace still. She was in Rins room which meant I had to wait longer. Sesshomaru waited for no one and yet here I was…

After what seemed an eternity, she came rushing out, flushed. Her hair flowing behind her and her breathing was rapid, her eyes glowing in the dark. For a slight moment…she reminded me of the girl I knew so long ago.

"My Lord forgive my lateness, the queen was in need of me."

I decided to skip that and just move on.

"What do you know so far?"

After explaining everything to me, I was a little pleased to know that I wasn't wrong about this girl. She would be a valuable asset to my information process.

She told me the night he turns human, what he does with his spare time, who his friends are, everything. I was satisfied, but I wouldn't tell her that.

"Find out more and meet me here same time in two days."

"Wait my Lord where are you going?"

I suddenly stopped. I never stopped for anyone.

"Nowhere."

"May I…-"I could sense her nervousness and it was new to me. Why was she nervous now and not when I was threatening her life? She was a strange mortal.

"May I accompany you?" I could see the pink on her cheeks even in the night. Why would she want to accompany me? Was she to spy on me now?

"No."

"Why not?"

"Why should you?"

"So I can know you better."

Her smile was as innocent as a child. "You will never accomplish that."

"Why not?"

I was surprised she had lived to be her age. What demon or human could stand her?

"Do as you wish."

"Really?! Thank you my Lord!"

I realized no matter what answer I gave her she was sure to follow anyways with or without my consent.

* * *

I was shocked that Sesshomaru-sama had allowed me to come along. I just needed to know the truth. I needed to know if everyone said he was as dangerous as they claimed he was. I needed to know he wouldn't be a horrible Lord like the one we had now. I needed to know…him.

I would not allow myself to help my Lord Sesshomaru to become the Lord of these lands if he was going to be a terrible leader. He had to have some good in him. Besides, he couldn't be worse than Lord Inuyasha.

"My Lord, what do you plan to do once you take the throne?" "You will find out once I kill Inuyasha."

I would get nowhere with the way he was conversing.

"Are you always so vague?" "Are you always this aggravating?"

"I am not! I simply wish to know you!" "You are obviously unable to hear because I said you would not accomplish that."

"You're a cold youkai!"

"I know."

* * *

It was actually amusing to see her getting all worked up. It was like playing with fire. The way her eyes lit up in pure rage, the way her hands balled into fists. I could get used to this.

She followed me all the way to Jakens home continuing to ineffectively interrogate me. Jaken had left to go back to one of his other homes to visit his family. He said he would be back within a week, and now I had found that I would throttle him the moment he came back.

My sensitive ears were taking a brutal beating.

"Why won't you answer any of my questions?" she inquired. I said nothing. '_Is there anything that would make her stop?'_ I thought trying to come up with conclusions.

I couldn't kill her so that was obviously out of the question. I couldn't strike her either on behalf of my mother, so that also was out of the question.

Not inflicting any physical pain was not an option which were usually ALL my options that I did. This was hard.

Then I came up with a solution.

Simply order her to shut up.

"Be silent. Your bickering is insufferable." "Sorry-not going to happen." I surprisingly remained calm. Maybe I was used to it already and didn't know it. What would it take for this woman to shut up?

"It is time you go back to your mistress."

She frowned.

"But my Lord, I don't have to be back unless she sends for me. I only stay with her in the palace because she is my dearest friend and she gets lonely."

"Then where do you plan on staying?"

She looked down and smiled bashfully. Why was she acting so strange all of a sudden?

"My Lord…I was hoping to stay with you-"

"No."

"My Lord please! I would love to stay with you in your home!"

"No."

I was literally going mad. It was as if I took one step forward and two steps backwards.

Immediately, I realized that this was a big mistake. What did I get myself into? I enjoyed when she was being the one who was annoyed, not me. When did the events change? Then an idea had come to mind.

"If I allow you to stay will you be silent?"

She nodded excitingly. Then she motioned her mouth closed. I finally got her.

Unfortunately I forgot that Jaken had always lived alone so there was only one bed. I could hear my mother from her grave shouting at me to not let a woman sleep on the floor. I of course was not sleeping on the floor either which meant we would be **sharing** it.

Again I had taken one step forward and two steps backwards.

I decided to sleep to rid myself of the headache she had given me. We were as far apart on the bed as we could be. "My Lord…I am not tired."

"I am. Now go to sleep."

"But Sesshomaru-sama-"

"I allowed you to stay-now be true to your part."

"I know but-"

"If you do not go to sleep, I will put you to sleep."

She hushed herself and I had the tiniest of grins on my face. Finally…the only sanctuary I have left.

* * *

I was a little nervous sleeping in the same bed with Sesshomaru-sama, but I hid my feelings. Something that I have practiced over the years and was quite good at now…

When he was asleep I would wander around to see if there was anything I could find of him. There had to be something that revealed at least a little of him to me.

When I was completely sure he was sleeping, I had crept out of the bed and wandered a little. I found my search futile until I happened onto what looked like a library. I opened the doors to see books from the floor touching the ceiling. It was amazing.

I looked book upon book and found only a little bit of history. It didn't help at all.

It was impossible to believe that his most faithful servant had nothing on his Lord. There had to be something…

My body had deceived me. It began to grow weaker within the passing hours. I was tired…

I finally decided it would be wise to sleep just so Rin wouldn't be more suspicious of my fatigue for tomorrow. I made my way back to the bed and found Sesshomaru gone. I was too tired to look for him and plopped myself on the bed. I drifted to sleep the second I touched the bed.

* * *

She was too noisy and awoke me by opening the door to escape from the room. As soon as she left I got up and followed her. What was she doing? Was she snooping around to try and find any weaknesses I had?

I had watched her search in dismay until she came to Jakens library. He didn't really have anything that would reveal me to anyone…unless he still had that _**one**_ book I told him to burn years ago. If he did he would surely never live another day.

She rummaged through books but could not find one that satisfied her needs. I was entertained by the expressions she made. How could humans have so many emotions?

She grew weary and made herself to the bed. She was huddled up in a tiny ball on the edge of the bed and out like a candle. I steadily placed myself on my edge as to not awaken her.

She even talked in her sleep, but not as loud. More like whispering. She was so much quieter when she slept and I wanted to keep it that way as much as possible. I drifted to sleep dreaming of murdering Inuyasha.

* * *

The sun had lifted in the sky and shined in my eyes. For some very odd reason I was particularly warm and my left leg felt numb. I opened my eyes to see the issue when it was my lord Sesshomaru! We were practically nose to nose. I couldn't contain the heat that appeared on my face. I just knew I was red.

His left arm was wrapped around me and held me close. His right arm was underneath my head and his heavy legs were entwined with mine. I had tried to escape but every time I made the slightest movement to move away, his fingers grasped me intensely and he would draw me closer.

It was useless.

What would I do if I woke him up? Surely it would be the last thing I would ever do.

I lay by his side for at least an hour an a half. During that time I chose to study him. No one had ever gotten this close to Sesshomaru-sama and so I used my time wisely to do so.

His hair was flawless even when he was sleeping; it flowed gracefully over his masculine body. The marks on his face simply added to his beautiful features. I had to admit he was good looking when he was asleep. The crescent on his forehead was adorable…I suddenly had the urge to just kiss it.

What was I thinking?! This was Sesshomaru-sama. I was pushing his buttons yesterday and decided to not do it today. I wanted to live.

I couldn't help the way the sun had shined on him making him look even more exquisite to admire. That's what it was. It was the sun and lack of sleep that made me think this way.

He looked so peaceful though! Unlike his solemn face and cold exterior he always had. It seemed my Lord had only truly ever loved one thing that never hurt him. Sleep.

I embraced him closer and he returned the gesture. It felt so nice to feel his firm muscles and not the armor he always had on.

* * *

My dear Lord Sesshomaru…his story is such a sad and heartbreaking one. What had happened to him was tragic from what Rin had informed me. I knew he wouldn't accept my consoling when he was awake, perhaps in his sleep he would.

Sure he was a mean and ruthless youkai, but he wasn't always like that. It showed in his slumber.

A bad feeling had unexpectedly occurred to me. If he woke up and found us in each others embrace like this…he would get angry, but if I attempted to break away from his hold on me, I would most likely wake him and he would get angry as well. It was a lose-lose condition…

Why did I always find myself in these circumstances more recently?

I decided I rather wake him then endure with the look of anger together with disgust when he found out how we were "cuddling".

I was in for it now…

I readied myself for the consequences to come.

* * *

I hurriedly escaped his grasp and accidentally fell off the bed in the process injuring myself. My head hit the floor dead on. I grunted and rubbed my head in pain. When I sat up-my Lord was gone. I felt a chill run down my spine to realize he was right behind me.

A/N- That's it for now! So how did you guys like it so far? Please let me know! I'm really scared that I don't have Sesshomarus character right. I feel its right but it all depends on you guys! I was really debating to myself whether I should put it on or not. This chapter was done about a week ago and I couldn't help but read it over and over to find any mistakes! I really love this pairing and want to continue but I don't want to do it if I'm not doing Sesshomarus character right. It would ruin the whole purpose! Sesshomaru is a calculating character to portray, especially since he is never known to be in love with anyone. Ahhh! I will never understand the male mind…Should I keep going or not? Please let me know so I can make more chapters!

Angel Of Gods Grace


	2. New Enemies, New Allies

**A/N**- I cannot thank you people enough for reading my story! I was so scared that it was going to suck real bad because this is my 2nd story and 1st Sesshomaru/Kagome story. So far so good right? Lol

Ahhh I got reviews! Thank you!

Yumi2482: Thank you so much for your review and for reading my story! It is much appreciated! I get so excited when I see a review its actually pretty funny.

Sesshy-805: Thanks for reading and reviewing! I also want to thank you for reading what I have to say cause a lot of people just read the story and not what the author has to say. Your review is much appreciated!

Animeshy: Thank you for reading and reviewing! I just finished this chapter when I got your review so I guess you got what you wanted? Lol and I'm so relieved to read that you think I have Sesshomarus character! It means a lot because I couldn't help but contemplate over it. I really appreciate your review! I hope my reviewers and all my readers enjoy this chapter!

* * *

Previously,

I decided I rather wake him then endure with the look of anger together with disgust when he found out how we were "cuddling".

I was in for it now…

I readied myself for the consequences to come.

I hurriedly escaped his grasp and accidentally fell off the bed in the process injuring myself. My head hit the floor dead on. I grunted and rubbed my head in pain. When I sat up-my Lord was gone. I felt a chill run down my spine to realize he was right behind me.

* * *

Chapter 1

**New Enemies, New Allies**

I awoke rather abruptly as I heard a thump from the other side of the bed. I quickly got up and looked to see the miko sitting and rubbing her head sheepishly. "What are you doing miko?"

She turned around slowly and chuckled. "Well you see…I kind of fell off the bed-""I can see that." "I'm glad you have the gift of sight my Lord." "Take a bath."

She stared at me questioningly. "What does **that **mean?!"

I inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly to calm my nerves.

"If you go back to the palace, you will smell like me. I can already smell my scent all over you-now bathe."

Inuyasha would probably know anyways by the fact that Rin had smelled like me yesterday, but if it was on the miko…

* * *

At least I still had my head on my shoulders. He didn't take it as bad as I thought he would.

The steaming bath was very relaxing and calming, but I still couldn't take the pictures out of my mind that it took of my Lord. Besides Inuyasha…I had never gotten that close to any man and it made me feel self conscious.

I then realized it was _**way**_ too hot in here. It made me think weird thoughts.

I got out and dried myself hurriedly. I was a little worried that Rin might be looking for me. If I wasn't there she would be temperamental the entire day.

I ran to the room to bid my Lord goodbye when I saw him taking off his shirt and putting his armor on. I blushed increasingly. "My Lord I must be going now." He was quiet. "My Lord I am going." I told him again a little louder and he still said nothing. I pouted. "How do I know when to see you again?" "I will contact you."

I grinned; satisfied that he had finally answered me.

* * *

"Kagome where have you been?! Our Queen has been asking for you ever since she woke up." "Sorry Sango I was busy…" she eyed me suspiciously. "What exactly were you doing anyways?" I sighed. "Long story, by the way where is Miroku?" her face lost its glow. "He is with Inuyasha helping him with politics and other negotiations with different directions."

Sango was my dearest friend. We had known each other since birth. Miroku had met us later on when we were teenagers, who was currently her husband and father of her unborn child. We had all grown up together. It helped that she had the same job I did, except that I was specifically the lead.

"Don't worry. Miroku will be fine." I reassured her. Miroku was Inuyashas' negotiator for everything. "I know but still, I can't help but worry." She rubbed her belly slowly. "What if he is too busy to raise our child with me? I know I am only three months but what if nothing changes by that time?"

Being a pregnant woman was far too much pressure on Sango. She was always so edgy and always had "what ifs" on her mind. Miroku had better thank me later on in life for me being here or she would go insane.

"Sango I promise he will be alright, he will be back in no time."

"Kagome where were you?"

I turned around to see Rin standing there in all her beauty. She was truly a beautiful woman.

Her voice was bold and bitter. She wasn't in a good mood today.

"My Queen, forgive my absence. I was taking care of my brother Souta. He had a bad fever. My mother couldn't tend to him because she was out getting the medicine for him while I made sure he was ok."

She remained quiet for some time and finally spoke. "Come Kagome. I wish to speak with you."

I complied with her request as Sango went about her business in the palace.

* * *

"What is the matter my queen?

Her back was towards me. I couldn't see the expressions on her face, but I could feel the sting in her voice. "Sesshomaru-sama was here." I bit my lip anxiously. I decided to remain silent.

She continued. "I…I talked with him yesterday, and he left-but I feel that he isn't completely gone. He is somewhere…I just don't know **where**." My heart was beating rapidly and my eyes widened in a panic. _'So Sesshomaru-sama had visited her…'_

"Kagome-chan…alert me of any signs you see of Sesshomaru-sama, anything. I-…I-" she turned around and water filled her eyes. "I knew how he would react when he saw me, but I didn't know what would happen to **me **when I would lay my eyes on him again after these five years."

Would I lie to my queen? What was I going to say to her? The hurt on her facade was clearly written. She's still in love with him. She still wants to be with him. I knew exactly how that felt…three years ago. _'Inuyasha…'_

"Kagome…you are the only person I can fully trust. Will you do me this favor?" her voice was desperate. My countenance fell and my mind was racing. "I-…my queen I-"

"Rin."

She glared at the intruder but surprise filled her. "Inuyasha…" she whispered. He wasn't supposed to be back until tomorrow night.

He simply stared at her. Was he listening to what we were saying? Panic overwhelmed my body and I was worried-for Sesshomaru.

"What were you discussing?" "It is nothing of your concern my Lord." Rin grinded her teeth, a bad habit that I noticed when she was always lying. "Nothing of my concern?" he asked more quizzically this time as he approached her walking leisurely. His hands were behind his back. I could already tell.

He had heard what she was saying.

"I guess I'm an idiot than Rin to not even see it on your face that you saw my brother already." He was looking down at her and she looked insignificant. "Did you really think that I didn't know? My dear Rin…I know where he is already."

We both looked up shockingly. Did he really know where he was? "Well if you know where he is then why haven't you bragged about killing him yet?" she inquired.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" he scoffed. I was more curious than ever now. Was Sesshomaru-sama safe? Did Inuyasha already kill him? Inuyasha had to be lying.

Inuyasha began to leave when he murmured, "Kagome come with me." "She is my maid not yours-""I desire to speak with her." He growled. Rin looked at me and gave a tight squeeze to my arm frighteningly.

"If he hurts you-""I will be fine my queen." I had to admit I was scared, but I was not going to give him the satisfaction of showing it.

* * *

"Make yourself comfortable." "I am fine standing up thank you." He smiled. How I missed that smile…

"You are still the same as ever Kagome, stubborn, strong, beautiful…" Why was he being so nice?

"What do you want my Lord?" I asked and he laughed hysterically. "I don't want anything, is it a crime that I compliment you?" "No my Lord, but it is only obvious why you had asked me to come here and what **is** a crime is murdering your brother."

He stopped laughing. I realized then that I had said too much. "Kagome…have you met my brother already?" "No." I said rather calmly. If I showed no emotion he wouldn't be able to tell. I had to feel nothing.

He came closer and smelled me. I just stood there and told myself it would be all over once he was done with his interrogation. "I forgot how wonderful your scent is. It always made me feel exhilarated."

How I wished that things could go back to the ways they were. How I wish Inuyasha hadn't turned abusive and beat me almost every time he smelled another males scent on me when it was only a friend. He was always way too jealous and controlling, now that he had the control, he was far worse than what he was.

I wanted to believe that he had changed, to believe that he was sweet and kind like he had been the first year in a half we had been together-but he hadn't. My heart yearned for him, but my mentality knew better. I didn't want to go back to the hurt.

"You know Kagome…we never really made love to each other and I know I would really enjoy it if you would come into my bed tonight." His husky voice and hot breath was on my neck. I shrank back and couldn't help but shiver.

"I see your body doesn't lie." I kicked myself mentally. What the hell was wrong with me? Yes I loved him, that much was true but there was no way I was going to do what he asked.

"Inuyasha…do not use my love for you, to your advantage." He grazed my face gently with his fingers. _'This is a trick Kagome, this is merely a ploy to get what he wants…'_ I told myself over and over.

"Kagome I am not trying to take advantage-""I think the queen would be most displeased to find me in your bed." "I still love you Kagome…"

"Do you not love the queen?"

"I did love her but-"

"There is no "but" Inuyasha. You are married; do not be disloyal to her."

"She does not love me and I do not love her. She wouldn't hesitate not even once to bed my brother"

"If you knew this and do not even love her, then why did you marry her?"

"Sesshomaru would surely come back if he had heard of our marriage and in order for me to take the throne he would have to die."

"You're using her as bait? You married her for power?!"

"Now you see from my point of view."

It was all coming together. He had still loved me, but what he wanted all along was power.

"You see I have it all planned. Once Sesshomaru is dead, Rin will commit suicide for sure. Once they are out of the way you will be my queen, and we will have many heirs together." "Inuyasha…you're a bastard." "I know that my father is dead."

My hands balled into fists. He was sickening me. "What about all those times you raped Rin?" His face showed confusion.

"What do you mean? She was the one who had asked _**me **_to bed her. With Sesshomaru gone she had needed someone and she chose me. I merely agreed with her adulterous request to make her feel."

I was now shaking with fury. _'The queen knew of my feelings towards Inuyasha and so she chose not to tell me?!'_ I had never felt more betrayed than at this moment in my whole life. "I assume she didn't tell you due to the fact of your feelings towards me which means you still love me."

"Inuyasha what we had died a long time ago when I took the last beating you gave me." "I only beat you because I cared." I shook my head. "No Inuyasha, if you ever truly loved me you would've cared to listen to me and know that I would never cheat on you."

"Kagome come on, look at you! You are gorgeous, innocent, faithful, everything everybody wants." "My Lord, I will not bed you. No matter what you say I will not bed you." His eyes burned with rage. "If this is about Rin I have no feelings for her. I used to love her yes but I got over that once I saw how disheveled and ruined she was the second my brother disappeared."

"Inuyasha it's everything! How could you even go through with this? Your plan is going to fail just watch and see." He smiled and it gave me goose bumps. "No, you wait and see. My plan is perfect. Rin does not suspect a thing. She thinks that I still love her and Sesshomaru doesn't even know that I know where he's at."

He used Sesshomaru in present tense which meant he hadn't killed him. It gave me a little relief. I tried my hardest not to ask about Sesshomaru. It would only be obvious that I was worried.

"If you speak a word of this, you will suffer the consequences that follow." He threatened. "My Lord, I have no idea what you're talking about."

He was pleased by my answer. "Good, now," he moved his hands to my waist. I tried to push him but it was as if I was trying to move a boulder. Thank Kami I was saved a second later.

"Inuyasha my Lord you must come and see this!" Miroku barged in.

'_Oh thank you Miroku I love you!'_ I screamed from within.

"Miroku, how many times do I have to tell you about that?!" "But Inuyasha it's about your brother." His eyes were wide in surprise. "What is it?"

"He had slain all of the soldiers you sent to assassinate him. His body is nowhere to be found." Inuyasha now frowned. "Kagome we will finish this once I return." He stormed out and Miroku winked at me. He knew what was going to happen if he hadn't come in the way he did.

I mouthed to him, "thank you." And he nodded.

* * *

I found myself worrying for Sesshomaru. What if he was badly injured? I then laughed at myself. I was beginning to sound like Sango.

I made my way out of the palace and into the gardens. I didn't even want to look at the queen. What Inuyasha had said was the truth-even though I wanted it to be a lie. I cringed at his words.

It seemed everyone was trying to kill each other. Rin wanted to kill Inuyasha, Inuyasha wanted to kill Sesshomaru, and Sesshomaru wanted to kill Inuyasha. This was too much. I was not getting paid enough for this job.

I sat by the rose bushes and sniffed their aroma. How I loved flowers. What girl didn't love them? They smelled pleasant; they looked spectacular and didn't have to care about their Lord Sesshomaru.

Why did I relate everything to him? Maybe it was because he was our only hope of dethroning Inuyasha.

I shuddered from the cold wind of night then understood why.

I didn't have to turn around to know Sesshomaru was standing above me. He was probably upset with me.

"Sesshomaru I know what you're thinking, you're probably upset that-" but before I could finish I felt tiny wet drops on my hands. It wasn't raining.

I looked closer using the moon as my light and saw that they were dark, like blood.

I hastily turned to see his left arm nearly severed, his usual façade gone and replaced with fatigue. My heart pace quickened at the sight of him. I arose immediately to hold him.

"My dear Lord who did this to you?"

He didn't answer but rather grumbled. He needed to rest and be safe and so I brought him to the only safe place I knew where no one would look for him.

* * *

He was barely conscious but still standing. His blood was leaking massively. I helped him walk as fast as he could.

When we finally made it to my house I brought him to my room and he fell on my bed. His eyes showed how furious he was and he grabbed at his left arm trying to close his wound.

I was glad that my mother and Souta were asleep so they wouldn't have to witness this.

I tried not to panic until it was all over and so I did what I had to do. I took off his armor and his shirt. He barked but I continued. "I know it hurts to move but I have to do this." He looked in my eyes and I paused for the slightest moment.

"I do not need…your help…miko." He managed to choke out.

"You can trust me Sesshomaru-sama." He then closed his eyes and I resumed doing what was necessary.

I ran to get clean water from the pond we had in a bucket. I grabbed a few rags, a needle, some thread, and heated the water up all in about five minutes. I ran back with my utensils to see him passed out.

He was still breathing, he was just tired.

I wrapped a warm wet rag around his gaping wound to stop the bleeding. Step one had been accomplished. Now came step two. I sowed his wound closed and cleansed his body of the blood all over him. When I was done cleaning him and the blood stopped, I saw there was a drop of blood on his face.

I hesitated to touch his face, but did so anyways. I gently rubbed his face and it was gone with one swipe. I don't think anyone ever touched his face.

I then wet it again and placed it on his forehead. I knew he was a demon but even I was still worried about the wound. The panic had started to come out of me now.

I left him only to wash his shirt and armor. When I was finished I looked at myself and saw that I was covered in his blood. I then washed myself clean before my mother woke up and thought I was the one bleeding.

I would explain to her in the morning, just not now.

* * *

I didn't open my eyes but I was awake. I didn't know how long I was sleeping but I did know where I was. I was in the household of the miko. Her scent was everywhere.

I now opened my eyes to search my surroundings. I was right like always. I sat up and roared at the throbbing tenderness in my left arm.

Curse that filthy half breed Inuyasha. He nearly cut my left arm off with the Tessaiga. I knew he had known of my whereabouts, but now that he had fathers Tessaiga, the battle had turned to his favor. I would not underestimate him next time.

I didn't really remember what had happened after. I lost a substantial amount of blood and wandered aimlessly. I remember going to the palace to find a remedy to close my wound when I saw the miko. After I saw her, I didn't remember after.

I looked down to my right to see the miko kneeling on the floor with her head on the bed sleeping.

She had taken care of me.

She had stayed by my side and watched over me until she could no longer stay up.

I eyed her intently. I had woken up first this time instead of her. I did not want to wake her, and be barraged with questions. Besides, she looked like she needed it.

Her hair was a mess and cascaded over her face in stands. Her breathing was light and soft and she smelled exquisite.

I then comprehended what I just said. Maybe I needed more rest than I thought.

I looked at my wound and saw it was stitched up and almost healed completely. This only meant I wouldn't kill her once I was the Lord of the West.

I got up carefully and dressed into my armor and shirt. When I headed towards the door, fate laughed at me. "Sesshomaru-sama, where are you going?"

"-Out."

I heard her whimper and I turned to see her standing with her hands in fists, the worry in her eyes. She probably didn't panic last night like any ordinary human would, but I guess now it was coming out.

Her blue sky eyes matching with my sun fire orbs. "Sesshomaru-sama you must stay for your own protection." "I will not hide like a coward. Inuyasha will pay for what he did to my arm."

She was silent for a moment and turned her face away. I did not like the way she was acting at all.

I wanted her to look at me. No one turned away from me.

"Miko."

She stubbornly remained quiet and refused to change her sight. I couldn't believe what I was thinking, but I rather she would say something then say nothing at all. I casually walked over to her and gazed at her. She shrank back a little but didn't back down. Now she had stared into my eyes, ferocity and anxiety overflowed them.

"Sesshomaru you are the only one who stands a chance against Inuyasha. If you die…all hope is lost."

How could I say no to her? I was indebted to her for what she had done last night, and Sesshomaru was never in debt to anyone.

"I will kill him when the time is right."

Relief was evident on her visage. She wrapped her arms around me. "Thank you."

I didn't move. I hadn't felt like this in a long time-but what was it? Confusion was obvious, but I felt…an emotion that I didn't like. Was I enjoying this?

I was indebted to her though, and so I allowed her to embrace me. It was the least I could do.

* * *

Now that Inuyasha knew I was here within the Kingdom, it was obvious he would only look for me. Also, the guards dare not attack me again after they saw my power. Inuyasha was no doubt fretting over how I am alive and when I would strike at any moment. I would leave him dwelling in his paranoia for now.

"My Lord I must tell you something that requires your immediate attention." I gave her my acknowledgement to tell me.

"Inuyasha has a plan, and I worry for you my Lord."

* * *

After she had explained everything, my hate increased tenfold.

My half brother wasn't as much of a fool as I thought. He had grown over the few years.

I was disgusted at the part of his using Rin to appeal himself, and even more disgusted that he was in love with the miko and tried to bed her. That would not happen ever. I wouldn't allow it.

She was trust worthy and proved to be a faithful ally. She would be useful to me once I was the Lord of the West. I promised myself that I would always protect her no matter what. No harm could ever come to her.

Randomly I heard footsteps approaching her room.

I hushed her and drew my blade. She shook her head at me.

"Wait, Sesshomaru-sama that's my-""Kagome, the queen requests to see you and-" she stopped. She looked right at me. I assume she knew who I was. "Oh you didn't tell me you had a friend over." The woman beamed.

I put Tokijin back in its sheath. This female was harmless. "Well anyways, Queen Rin wishes to speak to you. Her messenger has already come three times in an hour." "Why didn't you tell me mother?" "I thought you were sleeping dear so I told him you weren't here." She was about to smack her forehead when I caught her wrist. No one was going to harm her-not even herself.

* * *

I left the room to talk to my mother in private.

"Mother is it ok if he stays?" I asked politely. "Of course, as long as he causes no trouble he can stay." I was shocked at my mothers reply, but mothers know everything for some apparent reason. I guess she knew he was our only hope in having a better Kingdom and leader than the one we had now. "Thanks mama."

* * *

"Sesshomaru no one will suspect you are here so you can stay as long as you like. I am going to see the Queen, but I will only be gone for a little which gives you time to rest."

I didn't need rest. I wasn't tired. I just needed time to heal my wound.

Once she left, I decided I would tell Jaken that it was no longer safe for him here and that he should not come back yet. His home was a target.

When I had gotten to Jakens other home in the East, I explained all that had happened while he was gone, but only in a few words. No details, just the points.

"I was attacked. It's not safe where you live. Stay here for the time being. I will contact you if ever I am in need."

He knew more had happened, but I was never a man of words to begin with.

He obeyed and I went back to see if the Miko was home. To my dismay she was nowhere to be found. She must still be with Rin. In the meantime I had decided to walk around and examine everything in my Kingdom.

Many things had changed over the years I was absent.

After I went to about almost every shop, I stopped at one.

It was dark and shady, which meant there was something of value inside. As I walked in, a single demon was sitting and mixing herbs. I looked around and saw different remedies, and familiar lethal sicknesses.

I then saw a vial that seemed it contained nothing. When I drew closer it was I saw it was a clear substance. I picked it up to examine it more thoroughly. This drug was unfamiliar to me. I took the cork off and was about to smell it when the demon had interrupted me. "I wouldn't smell that."

He simply stated and kept on with his business. "Why?"

"One whiff of that and you will surely die. It can kill any demon, no matter how strong they are."

I was intrigued by the demon. "What is this substance?"

"It is a special purified poison by the miko herself, Midoriko. There are only five vials in the world and I have found only two. Any person who smells it or even touches it would die in only a matter of minutes. Humans though would take a little longer."

"Why is that?"

"It is specifically made to kill a demon, and reacts to the demon gene."

"You mentioned you had two…where is the other one?"

He stopped what he was doing and gazed at me.

"Your brother has it."

The demon knew who I was.

"Your terrifying merciless eyes are unmistakable my Lord. I was wondering when you would appear before me." He stood before me with impressive speed and handed me the vial.

"My Lord I want you to have this-as a token of my gratitude. Inuyasha killed Lord Inu No Taisho and he clearly does not deserve the throne-but you deserve to rule these lands my Lord. Use this to kill Inuyasha."

"I do not need assistance. I will kill Inuyasha my own way."

"Please! It is a gift." He pleaded.

* * *

"Kagome what should I wear, the blue or the green?" she showed me her dresses to decide from and I tried my very best to not strangle her.

"Kagome…what's wrong?"

"Nothing my Queen." I managed to forge a smile on my face. I was really good at pretending that everything was alright. I had done it for almost an entire year to my mother, but it seemed that this was harder than I remembered.

After agonizingly being in the presence of Rin, I needed to talk to **real** friends.

"Hi Kagome! Please come in."

It was always a pleasure to be around Sango.

"Hi Sango is Miroku home?"

"Yeah he's making dinner. Would you like to have some once it's finished?" I shook my head. "Uhh…no thanks. My mother would be upset if I came home with a full stomach."

Dinner had finished in only a matter of minutes and then the conversation turned serious.

"I want to thank you Miroku for the other day-""Kagome don't worry about it. If Sango had found out that I let that happen…" he quivered. "I don't even want to imagine."

I then asked him what had plagued my mind for the entire day.

"Miroku…did you know?"

He choked on his food. "Know what?" "You know what I'm talking about."

He put his head down in shame. "Kagome I didn't tell you simply because it would only hurt you. What would you gain from this upsetting news besides pain?"

I then decided to tell them both. "Only the perfect strategy."

They both looked at each other clueless, then looked back at me for answers which I was about to provide them.

Once I told them everything, they gaped in amazement. "Kagome do you realize what you are doing?" Sango of course was worried.

"My darling, have no fear, if anyone was in her situation, it would only be Kagome. No one is fit for this task but her. She will be fine."

For once I was happy that Miroku was on my side and sticking up for me. "Well…okay…as long as you are safe I am fine with that." She relinquished. "Oh by the way Kagome, since you are gathering information I think this is very vital of you to know."

I listened intently and urged him to go on. "Inuyasha is going to be away for awhile at war-he does not want to go, but if he doesn't he would have no choice but to dethrone himself and pass it to another person of royal blood which would be Sesshomaru. We all know he is going to the war but he will only be gone for only about two months, if not maybe longer."

I hugged Miroku. "Are you sure you should be telling me this? What if Inuyasha finds out?" Miroku shook his head. "Even I know that Inuyasha doesn't deserve to be the Lord of the West. I am doing this only for his best interest and everyone elses."

* * *

After hours of talking, arguing, and laughing, I bid them farewell and left. They were my home away from home. What would I do without my family?

I had stayed a little later than I had planned. My mother and brother were probably already asleep and dinner was most likely saved for me. I didn't hear a single noise besides the padding of my footsteps as I walked to my home. _'I wonder what Sesshomaru had done all day.'_

I told him I would be gone only for a little which turned out to be all day. He was probably busy with his own stuff anyways. It wasn't like he was waiting for me.

When I finally reached my home, I sensed everyone in their beds except one person…

I opened the door to my room to find no one inside. He wasn't here.

Where was he? I told him that he needed rest but that man was just intolerable. The moment I saw him again I was going to-

"Where were you?"

I was going to be petrified.

"I-…I-"

"Do not return this late ever." Who did he think he was ordering me around? I shook off my fear instantly. "Why? Is it a problem?"

"If anything had happened to you I would have no way of gathering information. I do not want to waste my time looking for you."

My heart skipped. Was he worried about me?

I had only known Sesshomaru-sama for about four days and I had touched his face, gained his trust, looked after him and cuddled beside him all in that time. This was just too much to take in.

"What information did you obtain?"

He snapped me back into reality as I nodded. "Inuyasha is leaving for a war. He will be back; he just needs to deal with political stuff. You know, the boring meetings at first and then he will go off in battle."

Sesshomaru had gotten very angry and I wondered why it was such a big deal? So what if he was going away. Yeah it would postpone the plan a little being that he's gone but I could still get information.

He said nothing like usual. Sometimes I wish he would just say something sometimes! I can never tell what goes on in that mind of his.

My stomach growled and I blushed. I hadn't eaten all day.

I walked out of my room to get food. I was starving.

When I was in the middle of eating Sesshomaru appeared behind me nearly making my jump out of my skin. How did he just keep popping up like that?

"Miko how long will he be gone?"

I turned around. "Dear Kami! You know you don't have to show up out of nowhere all the time-and I don't know my Lord, maybe a two months? three months tops?"

"The plan will have to wait." He mumbled.

"I could gather more information this way. Now that he is gone I can look through places I never could. This is a good thing Sesshomaru-sama."

"How will I kill him when he is not present?"

I saw that his mind did not change. He still wanted Inuyasha dead. Maybe this was my chance to persuade Sesshomaru-sama not to kill him during the time Inuyasha was gone. I had a few months.

"Hungry?" I offered. "I do not need to "eat" in order to stay alive like you humans do miko." "I didn't say eat-I said "hungry" as in do you want some?" he walked to my room.

"No."

Great, now he was in a bad mood. I had to deal with a grumpy Sesshomaru the whole night. Maybe if I tried to talk to him he would open up a little?

* * *

We both had entered the bed and I closed my eyes only to have to open them again.

"My Lord what is the plan for tomorrow."

"The plan now is sleep."

"My Lord…how old are you?"

"Very old. Now sleep."

"My Lord, what was your childhood like?"

"It is irrelevant."

"Sesshomaru-sama why do you hate humans?"

"Because they never know when to be quiet."

"What do you mean?"

It was as if I was talking to a human child! She asked the most pointless questions. These months were going to be _**long**_.

* * *

I woke up first again to find the miko in my arms. She was curled up into my chest.

I had my arm around her and my head was on hers. Her hair smelled good…

For only the short amount of time I knew this woman, she had made me feel like a different person. I didn't even recognize myself. A week ago I was killing demons and humans alike. Now here I was being nursed and practically sleeping together with one.

It brought back old memories of my childhood that shouldn't have been awakened. Now I was angry. I made my way out of the bed. The sun was barely up. I thought it a good time to check inside the palace for information.

* * *

Each morning was a new position. I would always wake up first and she would be in my arms. What was this? I woke up always feeling warm and calm since I had shared the same bed. This was new.

She was always hauling me around like a lost puppy and constantly chatting. I was starting to get used to it when she _**had**_ to bring something else into my life. "Fun"

I did not have "fun". Sesshomaru did not know "fun".

We went places and saw entertainment acts. I did not want to go, but the unhappy face she had made told me otherwise. I was going whether I liked it or not. Why did I put up with her?

'_Because you like her…' _my heart taunted.

"No!" I shouted as the miko eyed me fearfully. "Are you alright my Lord?"

Now I was talking to myself out loud. This was going to be great. I had only known her for a couple of weeks and she already had affected me tremendously. My heart hadn't felt anything since five years ago.

It had to be the way she smiled. She had such a warming smile-and the way she laughed. Her laughter could be heard everywhere. She made it known how she was feeling always. Or the way she always licked her lips when she was asleep.

That was unforgettable. It had stayed in my mind.

She had an affect on almost everybody everywhere she went. Where did this miko get these powers? She was always touching things too and I would keep the object or item from shattering or breaking. She had the touch of destruction.

The way her face had always moved, to sad, angry, happy, it was interesting. This was woman was full of life and emotion and wasn't afraid to show it.

The most alluring emotion was when she was truly laughing at someone or something that was apparently "hilarious".

Her expression of laughter was a disease. It made me smile a few times.

I had made her laugh a bunch of times, not on purpose of course but I had done it and it wasn't as bad as I thought. I started to think I liked putting a smile on her face. Just like the day I had mistaken her doll for a demon and slashed at it by accident. She fell to the floor in fits of laughter.

* * *

It now turned to two months, and it became our routine.

I wake up, he's gone, but only for a few seconds before I run to my window to see him outside. I had tried to teach him, how to relax a little while Inuyasha was gone but he was more up tight than anyone-but I wouldn't have him any other way.

Seeing Rin was a struggle everyday, but I would always leave in a rush to see my Lord again and like always he was waiting for me to be finished. He made me feel meaningful.

I had dragged him along everywhere I went and thankfully he obliged. I wanted him to see the good things in life. Not everything was always serious and about killing or defending honor or other things like that. I learned the hard way myself when I sank into a depression with Inuyasha long ago…

My heart had healed, but he left a scar that wouldn't vanish. I didn't want anyone to feel hurt ever again, especially the way I was hurt-even if it was a malicious bastard like Sesshomaru.

He wasn't as cruel as he used to be though, so I couldn't really say that. He was now changing…and I could tell. He wasn't as mean anymore, but he was always thinking. I thought even one time I saw the littlest smile on his features at times.

Then randomly one day I thought to myself one morning.

I wonder if he ever woke up and saw us…cuddling like the first time we slept together awhile ago.

I released the thought immediately.

Probably not, he would've said something or wouldn't have slept with me after that again.

* * *

It had been longer than two months and Inuyasha still had not returned. Personally I started to not care if he returned or not. I liked that he was gone.

-but Sesshomaru-sama was starting to open up more. He was saying a few more words and wasn't as vague. He got along with my family and my dearest friends Miroku and Sango. Everything was going great until…this one day…I rushed to the window and there I saw him for the past two and a half months like always.

It was different though…and I felt different. He was outside everyday in the morning when I woke up in the same spot, in the same stance, the same look, but today, just today, I wasn't happy to see him there.

I didn't want to admit it-but I was…heartbroken. I didn't want to see him standing there anymore. Instead of waking up and running to my window all the time, I wanted to wake up and see him lying beside me in my arms.

Reality mocked my heart and my thoughts were clouded with only Sesshomaru which was bad. I was always fighting with myself.

'_Kagome you know he does not love you…'_my mind scolded.

'_He doesn't have to love me…I can deal with friendship.'_

'_And when you _**cant**_ deal with it anymore what are you going to do?'_

'_I will manage.'_

'_You are always going to want more from him Kagome…and you know it.'_

'_Even still, I wouldn't damage our friendship just because of my selfishness to have him.'_

'_Kagome face the facts…you are in love with your Lord Sesshomaru'_

My wits were winning. I hated that I was such a logical thinker.

'_Answer me this…what is the point in loving someone who will _**never **_love you in return?'_

My heart throbbed at the painful reality but I had to look on the bright side.

So what if he would never love me. As long as he was in my life I was happy. I should be grateful for what I have, not what I **don't** have.

* * *

Rin had started to dissipate from my head, and surprisingly enough Inuyasha. More and more thoughts of the miko that I had befriended invaded my mind. The change was drastic.

It amused me before how she rushed to the window to see if I was there-now it was different. My point of view was starting to alter. I was no longer amused, but I looked forward to her looking for me each and everyday.

Of course I was going to be there. Why wouldn't I?

Then the worst possible had come true, of what I feared most. I started to lose enjoyment of seeing her at the window. I started to stay in bed longer and longer with each passing day just to be closer to her. I also found myself stealing glances at her nearly all the time.

'_Sesshomaru give it up…you are falling for this woman.'_

'_No…it is nothing but an infatuation.'_

'_Come now Sesshomaru…do not lie to yourself.'_

'_I will not allow the past to repeat itself!'_

There was no way I was going to let any of that happen. I was weaker then, and things have changed…including myself.

* * *

For some odd reason, while Kagome slept beside me, I found myself restless more and more every night. Maybe I needed to get some fresh air.

There were so many thoughts in my head I couldn't even think straight. What was happening to me?

The garden was my sanctuary and my place of thought. I would clear my head there.

I made my way to the garden and forgot how beautiful it looked at night. The sea of flowers before me glowed in the moonlight. It was truly a sight.

"Sesshomaru-sama…"

I guess the miko couldn't sleep either.

"What are you doing out here in the middle of the night?" she was barely even audible. "I should be asking you that question miko." she sank back like a child. "I couldn't sleep."

I smelled her lie from here…but why was she lying? Did I wake her?

"My Lord why don't you come back to bed, it is the middle of the night."

Ah. My brain had ticked. She couldn't sleep without me and she was too stubborn to admit it.

This was the first time I had left her to sleep alone for the night.

"Please…?" I looked at her and she looked... exhausted.

I wasn't ever going to leave the bed at night again-I didn't want her wandering and looking for me at night.

She grabbed my hand lightly and tugged. "My Lord…let's go." She whined like a baby, her bangs falling over her eyes.

I didn't know why, but I brushed the bangs out of her face softly. Her eyes looked so much different in the moonlight. I could gaze into them all night. They sparkled like a silver river.

It wasn't until moments went by that I noticed we said nothing and just looked at each other the entire time.

I think it was time for us to sleep.

I had no need for sleep, but it was the only place where I could have my solitude.

* * *

I felt the warm leave me as I wrapped my arms around me. He had left the bed…My body had gotten used to the heat he gave me at night and now I was shivering and it was only morning.

I walked to my window and…there he was. I imagined myself running to him and holding me in his arms…I longed for his touch.

I smacked myself mentally. I had to stop fooling myself…it would never happen, and to even think it was possible would only result in more agony.

"Sesshomaru-sama, I am going to the palace."

He gave me his acknowledgement as a sign of ok. I already knew which facial expressions meant what and how he felt. It took me awhile, but I learned them all.

When he looked out into the distance he was in deep thought.

When he looked in my eyes intensely, it would mean he agreed if I asked him a question,

Or when his left eyebrow went _slightly_ up it meant he wanted an answer right then and there.

There were plenty more, and it made me feel special. I felt bounded to him…I was the only one who knew of these things and he knew it as well.

* * *

I entered the doors to the Queens chambers. _'Here I go…only a few hours of torture and then I'm gone.'_

Rin was sitting by the pond with a frown on her face. Something was wrong.

Even after what I learned about Rin, I wasn't as bitter anymore, but I just didn't want to be around her. She wasn't trustworthy.

"Kagome is there something you would like to tell me?" she mumbled. I was a little concerned. What did she mean by that? "No my Lady-""Choose your words wisely Kagome…or they may be the last you ever say." The look she gave me told me she was not kidding. What was wrong with her?

"I want only the truth Kagome, is that so hard to ask?" I rolled my eyes when she wasn't looking. _'How can I give you the truth when you cannot provide it yourself?'_ "My queen I still do not know what you speak of."

She fed her koi fish and smiled. "Ok…then I shall ask you questions then."

The tension between me and her was maddening. How could Sesshomaru love this woman?

"Do you know where Sesshomaru is?" she paused. "No." I wasn't lying; I didn't know where he was at the moment. She had to be more specific.

"Really, so you were not in the garden with him last night asking him to come to bed with you?" her fierce stare was blazing. She was furious.

"How do I know right?" she laughed disturbingly. "Well I awoke from a bad nightmare last night and I was in a cold sweat. I opened the window for some air when I saw _**my**_ Lord Sesshomaru in the gardens below. I ran down to talk to him and make sure it wasn't just a dream when _**you**_ showed up. I hid and wondered why Kagome was here? Now it is only obvious that you love him and want him for yourself. The way you look at him speaks for your heart. You have been hiding him from everyone including me!"

Rin had…no damn right.

"It may not have occurred to you Rin, but Sesshomaru-sama does NOT belong to you."

"But his heart does! He may be sleeping with you every night but he is thinking of me!"

"So what! You are married to Inuyasha and that is enough to push him away!" her face snarled. "You foolish girl! I will kill him and when he is dead Sesshomaru will be the successor and he will be all mine-and when Sesshomaru and I rule this Kingdom, I will see to it that he never sees you again!"

Anger flowed throughout my body. "I doubt Sesshomaru would want that!"

"How do you know what he wants?! I know Sesshomaru and you don't!"

"You didn't even wait for him to return to marry Inuyasha! You married him to secure your title as Queen! You chose power over him!"

"I chose power **for** him! I did this to keep him safe from Inuyashas' power over the Kingdom!"

"Oh yeah?! What have you done to keep him safe? Bed Inuyasha every night?!"

The look of horror on Rins face was priceless.

"You bed him willingly Rin. Yes I know what really happened and don't try to deny it now! You ask for honesty-but how can I give it to you when you are a hypocrite? You don't deserve it!"

"I bed Inuyasha way before you came into the picture, and my reason for being with Inuyasha at that time was because Sesshomaru was gone! I was lost, alone, and with a man I didn't love! I needed to feel somehow!" Tears ran down her face.

"You don't know what it's like Rin! You don't know what it's like to be torn! I was in love with Inuyasha and now look! He is a monster! Everyone wishes for his death and I feel that I am the only one who wants to keep him alive! Yes he will always have a place in my heart that much is true-but it still hurts! It hurts to see him and only remember when he has nearly beaten you to the point where you are shattered!"

"It's painful to see Inuyasha…the man that was my entire world, become what he is today…I will give you the point that Sesshomaru had left-but who could blame him?! His father had married the woman he loved and he couldn't handle it-hell no one in this world with a heart could withstand anything like that! Don't try to blame it on Sesshomaru-sama for leaving! Look in the mirror and find out who is to blame!"

"I don't want to hear this-get out!" Rin screamed but I continued.

"You will get what's coming to you Rin. I promise you-"

"Guards-Give Kagome twenty lashings!"

* * *

She was late…very late. She always came as fast as she could, maybe even a little earlier than usual-but something had told me that there was something wrong and that I wasn't going to like the outcome. I was going to look for her.

I only walked a few steps and saw her walking slowly, towards me. I sensed the uneasiness and with one sniff I could clearly smell why.

Why did she think she could hide this from me with false happiness?

Before she even breathed my rage had taken over. I turned her around and lifted her shirt to see her soft flesh sliced twenty times.

"Sesshomaru-sama what are you doing?!" she groaned. "Who did this to you?"

"It doesn't matter my Lord."

Did she really think that? I would surely enjoy letting out some of my anger on this person.

"Do not make me ask again."

She hesitated, but she knew I would find out either way.

She sighed. "…Rin ordered the guards to whip me."

* * *

In an instant I was gone. She had called to me but this time I did not stop. Rin was going to know her place.

I was in her room in only seconds before she had entered herself.

"I see she told you-"

Before she could even finish her petty sentence, her neck was in my right hand and her body was against the wall-her feet dangling inches from the ground.

"From this day forward, if you ever so breathe the wrong way at her, I will forget my sentiments for you without a second thought, is that understood?"

Her eyes bulged and she struggled against my grip. I let her fall to the floor as she took her breaths in heaves, coughing roughly.

I think I made my point clear.

"You come for her but not for me?" she murmured under her breath. "I thought you loved me?"

She was in fact pathetic.

"You thought wrong."

I began to walk out when she sobbed uncontrollably. "Sesshomaru-sama please don't leave me! I beg you!" I carried on with no indecisiveness this time.

"Sesshomaru-sama PLEASE!" she screamed but I did not falter. She no longer had the hold on me she once had.

"Do you actually think you can find happiness with her?! Even if your heart no longer belongs to me, Kagomes' heart will always belong to Inuyasha!"

A dagger had cut through my heart. She was correct…but even still that didn't stop me.

"Fine my Lord-fall in love with her! You will see for yourself-she will choose Inuyasha over you and when she does you will be BROKEN again!"

I halted, and did something that I hadn't done since my mother was alive.

I smiled.

I turned my head and saw her tear-stained face shocked at my expression. She was giving herself too much credit.

"You never broke me."

* * *

A/N- So how was it? Was it worth the wait? Should I keep going? Please let me know! I'm sorry I made it long. It's just when I get reviews it makes me want to add more to my story for some reason! **btw-**the next chapter is in my head and man is it exciting! I want to put it on so bad but I can't do that unless you guys want to read it. Let me know guys! Oh and do you think I pushed them a little too close too soon? I mean two in a half months should be enough time where their feelings start changing for each other right? Any tips? Just let me know! I always like to hear other peoples ideas and point of views!

Thank you for reading my story!

-Angel Of Gods Grace-


	3. Our Song

Guys I have been having a rough week...

The only thing that cheers me up a little is that I read the last chapter to Inuyasha. It was sooooooo sad and cute and everything! Ahhhh I cant contain myself it was sooo good. Way better than the TV series. She should've stuck with the manga for the TV series! It would've been such a better ending! Truly love this anime and will never forget it.

And wow I got more reviews! That's the best medicine for any day! I cannot thank you guys enough! Thank you so much! I feel so warm and fuzzy inside. All your reviews are much appreciated and helpful! I was really having a rough week and this had cheered me up a lot! Thank you guys!

Takeshi-ai- Omg thank you for your wonderful compliment! I was jumping up and down at my computer like "YES!" Thank you it made me finish faster.

kAgOm3lOv3R- Thank you for the review. I'm SO glad it was worth waiting for. I don't want to keep anyone waiting too long lol. I may take long at times from readers block or something but I will never abandon a story-ever.

DarkLady666-Thank you! :Hugz: Love your review!

Sesshy-805- Thank you much. I want to keep my readers interested. So far so good? lol

Sweetest Angel- I'm glad you love my story! Thank you for that-I always look forward to coming home from work to jump right on the computer.

Yumi2482-lol I want to keep it that way so thank you! This means I'm good still so if you don't update the next time I will know I did bad then. Lol j/k

I L o v e l e s s- You have no idea how much your comment means to me. I had a really bad week. I can rest easy-Thank you so much!

Kydarkangel2007-That's actually funny because that is what this chapter is about. I wanted to explain more in this chapter with things between Inuyasha and Kagome. Plus I want to thank you for your advice, but trust me-I got my reasons not to rush Kagome and Sesshomarus feelings. They have only known each other for so long and I didn't want her to fall in love in the first chapter of the story either especially Sesshomaru because he is very solemn. I felt like I would be rushing them if I did-a lot of authors rush them and I don't want to do that. Plus I wanted people in suspense and to keep reading to find out you know? Thanks for the advice again and let me know any more advice if you have any! : )

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha at all. It all belongs to the great Rumiko Takahashi and the song is not mine either! It was created by Tan Dun and I merely changed it slightly to go with this fic-nothing else. It does not belong to me at all.

No more stalling read on!

* * *

Chapter 2

Our Song

When I returned to the miko, her mother was cleansing her wounds.

"Kagome you should know better than to argue with Rin-no matter who was right or wrong. She is Queen and will of course use that to her advantage."

She sniffled. "I know mama, but it was worth it. I have no regrets about anything I said."

This had to be my favorite trait about the miko. She never regretted anything she did no matter what.

I made my presence known and her mother smiled. The miko remained where she was. "Oh Sesshomaru-sama, I trust you took care of everything."

I merely nodded. She approached me and handed me the bloodstained rag and returned the nod. I now knew where Kagome got her intellect from.

She left without another word. I advanced toward the bed and dabbed at the blood. How I craved to kill someone at this moment.

Kagome cringed at the pain. "Sesshomaru-sama you don't have to do that…It doesn't hurt."

"Why then do your eyes fill with tears?" She said nothing and I dabbed again more carefully. The blood wasn't as bad, but it was dripping still from the fresh cuts.

I couldn't help but scan her body. She was backless and I found my sight descending to her front…touching her skin made me want to only touch her more. I wanted to feel her and see if she was soft everywhere on her body. I hurriedly dismissed the thought.

She would most likely slap me and I would take the hit unfazed-it was just how she would feel about it. Would she let me sleep with her again? I didn't want to find out and so I continued, enjoying a little too much for my own comfort.

* * *

When the wounds had stopped bleeding I got up only to hear what was obvious.

"Where are you going my Lord?" Did she ever get tired of asking that question?

"To get medicine that will heal your wounds faster."

* * *

The ointment I had was in Jakens place. I entered, seeing it still looking disastrous from my previous fight with the soldiers.

I obtained the ointment in seconds and hesitated for a moment. I went to the library.

Jaken still had the book about me, I just knew it-and I would find it before anyone else did. I knew exactly where it was and when I looked behind the bookcase and opened the hole in the wall it was…

-gone.

"Is this what you're looking for Sesshomaru-sama?"

That bitter voice belonged to none other than Rin.

"I thought you would come looking for this." She grinned, laughing. "You know I didn't know you had killed more people than your father and Inuyasha put together! Wouldn't Kagome like to know that? To see that **you** are really the monster-to know the **demon** she is bedding is the greatest murderer this history has ever seen?"

Maybe I didn't make my point clear enough from earlier-and why did everyone think that I was bedding the miko?

"Your path will forever be tainted with blood my Lord...she will not accept you once she finds out who you really are-but I will. I have always accepted you."

"Get out of my sight." I simply commanded. Her eyebrows furrowed, and she breathed heavily.

"I am only telling you because I want to protect you. She will hurt you, this I promise you. She will bring nothing but pain to your heart."

"I will not say it again."

She turned away from me and laid the book on the table beside her.

"My dear Sesshomaru-sama…don't you see? She is only using you to get to Inuyasha, and when you finally convey your love for her-she will leave you in the dust…"

She walked out to leave me contemplating with her last words.

'…_using me?'_

* * *

My heart had scolded me for thinking the miko would do a treacherous act, but my mind was too logical for my own good.

'_She would never do such a thing…she has proven her trust-'_

'_She still loves Inuyasha…she said so herself. She went to the palace all the time too…they all had to be conspiring against you…'_

'_She is not Rin…'_ I told myself.

'_Do you really want to be damaged again?'_ My mentality argued back. _'You nearly survived the last blow…what if this injury is more harmful than the last?'_

My mind was winning. I didn't want to take that risk. I wasn't going to be betrayed.

'_If she betrays me then all I would do is kill her-'_

'_Do not fool yourself! You don't have it in you to kill her! You are starting to fall for her.'_

I shook my head disappointed at the truth of what I was about to confess to myself.

'_I am not just starting to fall for her-I have __**been**__ falling…'_

* * *

I had made my way to give the miko her salve when a strange woman appeared that everyone called an "oracle". Everyone had crowded around her but I could not see her face. She was covered completely in a black robe. It seemed when she acknowledged me, she was staring into my soul. The tension was heavy.

Tending to Kagomes' wounds was more important. I began to walk away when her eerie, but dulcet voice hung in the air when she sang her words:

_What blessed night is this?_

_I wait patiently for your return._

_What auspicious day is this? _

_Dreaming beside my Lord?_

_I'm too bashful to stare_

_A secret I cannot share_

_My heart fills with longing_

_To know you my dear Lord_

_I am torn apart_

_You do not care for me_

_My heart only sees you_

_I wish you could see me too_

_My heart lives for yours_

_But you do not see me_

* * *

When her song was done everyone had clapped. The words had hit me and reached out to me. This could not be just a mere coincidence. Who was this woman?

I turned to see a young child passing out the lyrics of the song to people when she had approached me. "Would you like one?"

* * *

When Sesshomaru left I tried to wait as patiently as possible. Everyday it grew harder and harder to not be around him…I felt so selfish.

I wanted to be with him all the time, for every waking moment of my life and it seemed even in my sleep. I could not sleep without him beside me in the bed anymore, I had felt…so alone without him.

Is it wrong of me to feel this way about him, to want to be with my Lord Sesshomaru all the time-to even want to be…loved by only him and no one else?

I sighed. It would never happen. Why was my mind always deceiving me? He did love someone before-he's capable of love at least, but I don't think he would allow that again. Even to think about Sesshomaru-sama not being with me forever…it killed me. I tried so hard not to think about it everyday, but it just gets harder and harder.

Images of Sesshomaru leaving plagued me. When he was the Lord of the West, what would happen? Would he just leave me in the dust? Would he be too busy to see me again? Am I just someone to be used for his power?

I shook my head. No…he wouldn't. I could tell when we sleep that he holds me. I just know it. I never catch him because he wakes up before me all the time, but I feel like I'm always warm when he sleeps with me. How can I go on without him?

Immediately my heart pace increased and I gasped. Is this…love?

"Kagome…I see your wounds have stopped bleeding."

Rin seemed calm and relaxed, and surprisingly not angry. What was she doing here?

"Guess what…you cannot believe what I have found." She smiled.

She held the book in front of my face. How did she get it?

"I also saw Sesshomaru-sama right before I came…" she grazed my cuts and the pain shot through my back.

"-and found out that he is only using you to get his title-""You lie."

She chuckled softly and again she touched my wounds lightly, but the pain was becoming worse.

"Kagome…you know the truth…come now…you had to have thought about it already." Tears welled up in my eyes. The sad thing was that I really had thought about it before…I just always tried to ignore the truth.

"The truth is…he is using you only to better himself-to murder Inuyasha. You don't REALLY want Inuyasha **dead**…do you?"

I shook my head. No I did not want Inuyasha dead-but I did not want him on the throne either. My Lord and I share this opinion.

My tears were coming down in streams. He just couldn't be using me…not Sesshomaru-sama.

She bent over and whispered in my ear.

"After he is done using you to fulfill his plan, he will never have anything to do with you again. He will toss you aside like trash…the second he is the Lord of the West."

What Rin was saying impaired my spirit…_'Maybe she is right…'_

"Kagome…I love him more than my own life…but we both know what he truly is-and he is the most _**ruthless**_ demon anyone has ever seen on this earth now that his father is dead. He is the most feared demon alive. He will stop at nothing to gain more power. That's all this is about."

I was bawling silently now. I didn't want to hear anymore.

"I know you desire Sesshomaru…I know you do-but you will only end up hurting yourself more if you don't stop this irrational thinking that **maybe** Sesshomaru will change."

"I don't want him to change. I love him for who he is." I heard her sigh in desperation.

"Remember the last time you thought that? You ended up lost and depressed. You were ripped and torn apart. Do you want to take the risk of being hurt again? Does he even share the same feelings you do?"

"Rin…shut up." She frowned and backed away a little. "I know…that he doesn't have the same feelings I do for him, but he sure as hell doesn't like you either!"

She yanked my hair to force me to look at her. "He will never love you or anyone else for that matter. If I can't have him no one can, especially not someone like you. What is it that Sesshomaru-sama finds in you so appealing? Is it your feeble heart that he can easily take advantage of? Or is it the lack of intelligence you have that he can manipulate you without question?"

She released me once she saw the fury in my face. She grinned. "I could feel your energy flaring. I know the truth is upsetting but you will learn to live with it. Someone had to tell you. ""Tell me Rin-do you insult me because you find me a threat in taking Lord Sesshomarus heart away from you or because you're a spiteful pessimist?"

"Neither. You could never take him away from me-""You're right. You saw to that all on your own. You only say those things because you are jealous of what I have-Sesshomarus trust."

She grimaced and dug her nails in my lacerations. I screamed in agony.

"He will take me back! Just you wait and see when Inuyasha is dead! He doesn't even care about you-"

"But **I** care about him and that's all that matters! I will always care about him because I am in love with him!" I shouted and Rin withdrew her hand in astonishment.

"You're a fool…Your love for him will be your own downfall." She muttered. Leaving the book she stomped out the room and I let the waterfall unleash.

My mother ran up and tried to comfort me as much as she could but I could not stop shaking from the sorrow of my reality.

It was true what Rin had said…he didn't care about me, he didn't share the same feelings, yes he probably would throw me aside like garbage but-I am in love with Sesshomaru-sama which meant I would not abandon him no matter what. I would always wait for him.

Love…

I Kagome Higurashi…am in love with my Lord Sesshomaru.

If I remembered correctly, being in love is caring for the person and accepting them even with their faults.

Inuyasha was a different story…I could no longer keep going back to him and nearly bleeding to death from his beatings. I died a little inside each time he struck me. Sesshomaru would never strike me-that I had known much but…

Would my soul be able to withstand his insensitiveness?

The thought made me anxious. I was scared…my feelings for him were always intensifying and I knew this day would come. One day I wouldn't want to be just a person he could trust. I would want more…I would always want more and that made me feel horrible.

Never had I felt so self-centered when it came to my Lord. I wanted him to sleep beside me, I wanted to see him all the time, spend all my time with him, and most of all…I wanted to touch him soooo badly.

Sesshomaru is not someone who showed emotion though…ever. He really could be cruel without sympathy if he wanted. He is a demon after all…

A demon…and I am just a human…

We were both in different worlds…demons despised humans and humans were frightened of demons. That also separated us.

I felt as if my love for him was about to make me burst.

* * *

My mother had cleansed my back again.

"My dear Kagome what happened?"

"Mama…how do you stop loving someone?"

She frowned. I guess she knew where this was going.

"Kagome…the truth is you can't. Once the person is in your heart, they are there forever. Your heart doesn't just pick anybody. It happens for a reason."

That was such a mom answer. "Mama…what if the person you are in love with doesn't feel the same way? What do you do then?" I sniffled.

"First of all…do you know for sure whether the person loves you or not? Instead of just thinking the person doesn't, why don't you ask?"

I couldn't ask. I wouldn't ask. What if I heard him say what I feared most?

"Kagome…you deserve someone who will treat you right-someone who will always be there for you and give you all the love you need, someone who always makes you happy."

"Miko."

* * *

I could smell that Rin had been in the house. What did she think she was doing?

I entered to find Kagome and her mother cleansing her wounds. It seemed they were opened up again.

Rin had done it no doubt; her jealousy had taken her too far. I would go back and show her no leniency but more importantly I would delay that for the time being to see that my miko was well again. I wanted to see that smile before I left-and I was not leaving until it was so.

The mother kissed her daughter on the forehead and looked in her eyes with sadness. "I only want what's best for you…do what you feel is right, and what will make you happy."

She left rather quickly and I sensed she took the boy out of the house with her. After that I just knew something else happened. Then my eyes wandered and saw the book of my past. She tricked me…and made me think that the book she left on the table was the actual book.

Even my mother had to understand that this woman was pushing my chivalry to its edge. I was going to make her cry out for forgiveness and beg for her life.

"Sesshomaru-sama I did not read it."

She had known where I was looking. "What's past is past. I only care about the now."

If she didn't read it…then why was there an awkwardness that lingered between us?

Silence had passed. I put the healing salve on her and she was fully healed within minutes.

She did not move though…nor did she smile. She faced away from me and put her shirt on. I was going to find out what was bothering her.

"What's wrong?" I simply asked. She said nothing. Rin had probably fed her lies just as she did to me. Whatever that wench had said had gotten to her. She just looked at me with those big blue eyes. They were full of grief.

"You will answer me." I demanded but she continued to look away from me and stood up to leave. Never had I seen her act this way and it unsatisfied me greatly.

"Kagome…"

She stopped. It was the first time I had ever called her by her name…and I kind of liked the effect it had on her.

She turned to face me when her sights caught the paper I had. "What is that?"

I took out the paper and gave it to her to read. When she had finished, she read aloud the last two sentences.

"My heart lives for yours, But you do not see me." She trembled and closed her eyes. What had made her this way?

"The woman in this song…she loves him…her Lord?"

I nodded.

"-but her Lord does not see her love…he does not know…-how tragic." she covered her mouth to shun her sob. Tears raced down her cheeks.

"Sesshomaru-sama…is this **my **song?" I was stunned.

Then I began to reveal the truth as to why I gave it to her.

"No…I gave this to you to because the woman in the song is me." It was her turn to be shocked.

Now all the feelings I had were coming out. They began to surface-I couldn't confine them anymore. What was happening to me?

"Both you and Rin…use me…to get what you want….both of you, use my suffering heart as your weapon to capture me in your embrace and make me believe that you are truly sincere. Can you say it is not so?"

Now was the moment of truth. I had to know for myself whether she really was using me or if she had been faithful all along.

My rage over all these years was consuming me. My eyes saw the blood and evidently she did as well. My reflection in her eyes showed the red in my own.

"Admit it!" I roared but she did not wane. "No." she mumbled sternly. Out of nowhere, Kagome suddenly looked like Rin…. My blood boiled. No one tricked me! No one dared to lie to me!

* * *

I had no idea why all of a sudden he had gotten so angry…and it worried me.

"You will learn not to fool me!" he growled, seizing my wrists, his grip was powerful. "I am not Rin!" I shouted but he was lost in his anger…

"You are her!"

"No! I am not Rin!" I pleaded trying to get out of his grasp. "You are her! You influenced Kagome to conspire against me!" His fury was so great he couldn't even see that it was me.

I slipped out of his grasp from the oily salve and began to run. He blocked the doorway in a second and I felt like jumping out my window. Was he going to hurt me?

"I am not conspiring against you! I could never hurt you my Lord!"

He snatched me and shook me by my shoulders. "I sicken from your lies Rin!"

"No Sesshomaru-sama!" he began to rip off my clothes. "You want to open your legs for everyone?! You want to bed my father and brother?!"

I was crying hysterically, trying to shield myself from him but he was too accurate and agile. "I would never my Lord!" His orbs were now beginning to look saddened. "You are in love with that filthy half breed! You would go back to him!" Now I was completely naked.

"I wouldn't Sesshomaru! I have you-I love you!"

"Don't say that! Don't say those words!"

"I love you Sesshomaru…more than anything!"

He brought me into his chest and held me tightly. "Don't hurt me Kagome! Don't…"

"I won't…I will never." I told him speaking from within and returning his embrace. I was finally holding him.

He was beginning to calm down. "You could hurt me. You **could**-""But I won't hurt you Sesshomaru-sama. I will never hurt you." I repeated.

We were now quiet, just enjoying each other and still holding on, not wanting to let go. I squeezed him closer to me and his fingers gripped me tighter. I wanted to stay like this forever. I would die in his arms and be satisfied.

I moved my hands to his, and he held my hands. I never noticed how tiny mines seemed to his.

I moved my head to look up at him and I melted. His eyes went back to their original shining gold. His focus now moved to my eyes as well and it looked as if he softened.

Then my face turned red. I had forgotten I was naked…

"Kagome…" he breathed my name. He sounded so lovely when he spoke my name…it just flowed and gave me tingles through my entire body. It was also better than "miko" and "woman" that's for sure.

I didn't even notice that I was now against the wall. I grasped his arms tighter in a panic. It didn't seem like he was looking…but it was embarrassing just being in the presence of him bare.

Kami how I prayed clothes would just appear on my body. Then everything would be ok.

* * *

When she had said those forbidden words, I could feel my pulse quicken. Her voice…this was Kagome.

I enfolded her into my hold, her arms wrapped around me and I felt like myself again. No one could hurt me-except her. She held the power to break me. I would surely perish inside if she was never with me.

The silence that passed was golden, and when she grasped me closer I returned the action.

When my hands grazed her skin, it came to my notice that she was naked…I had ripped her clothes off in my fit of rage.

When she dropped her arms I held her hands gently. She looked up at me and I tried my hardest to look only in her eyes.

Her face turned crimson and it finally hit her. She never looked so beautiful than at this moment.

"Kagome…" I walked closer and she backed away. Any other time I would have let her go-but not this time. Her back was against the wall and I blocked her way with my arms above her, and she grabbed my arms-tightened in fear. It enticed my senses.

I drew closer to her face and she still remained as she was. My forehead was against hers and her breathing pace increased. The way her chest rose up and down was fascinating.

"Sesshomaru-sama…" she respired. I watched as she said my name and how smoothly it sounded.

I could feel our bodies reacting to each other, and how much closer and closer her lips seemed to be getting. I brought my finger to her chin and lifted her gaze to meet mine delicately. Her breathing came out shaken and uncertain like her eyes.

Uncertain…did this mean she was indecisive about me?

I breathed inward and modified my thoughts quickly without another word, ashamed of what I had done to her. I nearly shredded her to pieces from what I had kept bottled inside for so long. Did this mean she no longer wanted me present? Did she fear me?

* * *

He obstructed me to keep me from fleeing. I didn't really want to run to begin with but he was acting so out of character. Where did this come from? First he went into a rage and berated me, and then randomly it suddenly changed to tenderness towards me right after-what was going on?

We were forehead to forehead and I instantly forgot how to breathe. My pattern got all mixed up and I panicked even more because I was breathing wrong. How could I forget how to breathe?!

"Sesshomaru-sama…" I managed to say breathlessly. He lifted my chin to see him face to face and I was in a trance. His mesmerizing eyes captivating me. Butterflies danced inside me and I felt self conscious.

Was I going to make the first move? I was so confused. I was never good in situations like this. I longed for this moment. I dreamt of my lips caressing his. I persuaded myself into mustering up the courage to do it when…

I saw the hesitation, and he no longer looked at me. His focus was elsewhere. What was wrong? Did I do something? I had achieved all this courage for nothing? I was determined more than ever now. I was going to get that kiss!

I must've gotten the courage of Kami himself because I brushed his cheek with my finger tips affectionately.

I loved him-and I would show him. I may not ever have this chance again…

I closed my eyes…

Leaned forward…

And kissed him…

It was everything I had wanted and more. I nearly collapsed from how delightful and enchanting his lips had made me feel. It felt dreamlike and so serene…my mind was racing like crazy.

* * *

I almost caught her hand in mine, but I trusted her enough. She grazed my face with her fingertips. No one had touched my face since I had seen Rin the last time five years ago. Never did I allow anyone to touch me, let alone my face.

For no one touching my face, I took a great pleasure in it. Maybe I should allow her to touch my face all the time.

I was too busy in my thoughts when I felt the contact of her lips on mine.

The feeling it gave me was beyond description. It was…elegant…and magnificent. The reaction it gave to my body was stunning and relishing. It was complete elation and exultation. I felt jubilant.

Her lips were so soft…and ideal. Our lips had fit each others perfectly. It was as if they were meant to be in contact. How could I put this on hold for so long?

I couldn't allow this to slip away. I kissed her back, and moved my lips along hers. She shivered and my excitement exceeded. My hands were out of my power now. They grabbed her closer to me and her hand wrapped around my back and with her other arm, she ran her fingers through my hair.

I let out a low growl and an emotion within me burst that I hadn't felt since-ever.

* * *

He kissed me back and I trembled from the thrill.

Kami he tasted sweet. He yanked my body closer and I obliged. I ran my fingers through his hair, and grinned inside. I had finally touched it! It felt just like it looked-beautiful, soft, and flawless.

He growled softly and I could not longer hold back my smile, and I wanted to hear him growl more…and louder. He began to kiss me more fervently, and swiftly. Was this really happening? Was this a fantastic dream that I would then wake up and be so disappointed?

Well-the dream could go on for as long as it wanted. His tongue…Kami…his tongue licked at my lips to enter and I consented. He plunged in wasting no time. I moaned into his mouth and he smirked.

After what seemed like forever, we separated to catch some air. I was flustered and panting. I was starting to remember how to breathe and he looked the same, excepting he was trying to catch some air in his lungs and his hair was…a sexy mess. It made me want to kiss him all over again.

He came closer again, and my breathing pace increased. Why did he always mess up my breathing pattern? This just wasn't right!

His lips just about touched mine. They were so close…yet so far. Was he teasing me?

I frowned to see him walking away? What happened?

"My Lord-""I will be back." In a flash he was gone.

* * *

After we separated, I could still taste the pureness of her. I fought with myself to keep myself under control. I never let my emotions run me, though this one time it was a good thing.

But it didn't start off good. She was still naked, and it just reminded me of what I did to her merely minutes ago..

I leaned closer to her again, to look in her eyes. I no longer saw uncertainty. I saw her hunger for me and that was what I wanted.

It then occurred to me that the oracle that I saw…she was talking about Kagome…and me.

This song…was not hers, and it wasn't mine-it was **our **song.

I was going to talk with this woman.

I had to walk out now if I wanted to ever get out this room and not take the mikos innocence.

Then again…she was already naked, that part was already accomplished. All I had to do was take my clothes off and…

I smacked myself mentally. It was time to leave.

"My Lord-"

Before she could answer and before the monster in me had ravished her I left quickly with one answer. "I will be back."

* * *

It didn't take me long to find her.

"I know you are looking for me Lord Sesshomaru, and I know what you want to ask-""Then answer me."

She unveiled herself, and I saw that she had the appearance of a female human and blind. How did she know I was there when she has no sight?

"The reason why you had seen Rin and not Kagome, and why your emotions unleashed is simple. Your heart could no longer remain quiet. It wanted to be heard."

My eyebrows furrowed. "What are you?" She chuckled slightly.

"I am a human my Lord. I was born blind. All the females in my family are blind, but for the price of our sight, we have the greatest sight of all-future. My Lord…." She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

"I'm most glad that you came, I needed to warn you of a vision I have been having."

"Speak."

"Inuyasha is winning the war, he will come back soon-but when he does, a great tragedy awaits you not so long after. So great is this calamity, you will be broken. It will be most unexpected. Everything around you will fall into chaos…"

My hands balled into fists. "As long as Kagome is safe I don't care what happens to me-""But my Lord, you must not rush to kill Inuyasha. Do not run blinded by rage to kill him or misfortune will find you and nothing but one catastrophe after another will happen. It will be a long time until you find happiness again. You may not even find it at all."

I was silent…contemplating. "When is the right time to kill him?"

"In a few months."

"I will not wait that long-""If you are impatient my Lord, you will suffer your ultimate defeat."

I glared. "That won't happen."

* * *

Now that I knew something bad was going to happen I was more alert than ever. Nothing would escape me.

I was also not waiting that long to kill my pathetic half brother.

Who was she to give me orders anyways? No one ordered me to do anything.

It was already late by the time I returned to Kagome. She was probably sleeping by now.

I entered the room to find her in her bed with her eyes closed, but still up. She waited for me.

She did not make a sound until I entered the bed.

"Sesshomaru-sama…" she nuzzled into my chest. I placed my hand behind her head to draw her closer and put my head on hers. This was the first time our bodies were entwined and awake at the same time.

How I adored her. This woman had opened so many perspectives and ideas to me. I simply…could not bare the thought of her being harmed. Whatever calamity the oracle was talking about, Kagome would most surely be safe.

I hugged her tighter, my protectiveness taking me over. She was all mine and no one else's.

"Sesshomaru-sama…I-…I love you."

Even with my hearing it was hard to hear what she had said but I did-and for once in my entire life, it…made me feel…nervous. I can not remember the last time I was nervous-maybe when I was a child but this had topped it by a landslide. What would I say back? I didn't want to say it unless I meant it.

She looked up at me. Those alluring sapphires captivated me. I had never said those words-not to any other female besides my mother when she was on her deathbed. I didn't even say those words to Rin. Never had I spoken those words and I promised myself I wouldn't either.

"Kagome…-"

I was stuck. I would mean it…but I believe that those words should be used wisely at the right time and only if it was how you truly felt. That was the only time you should say it.

"You don't have to say it my Lord. I just wanted you to know how I feel." She beamed and resumed laying her head on my chest.

'_I love you too.'_

* * *

I loved being in his embrace while we slept. It brought back old memories. I really couldn't stand him back then-I would've never thought I would actually fall in love with him. Now that I told him, a great weight lifted from me.

I felt such a relief to let Sesshomaru-sama know of my feelings for him. Yes I was scared, but it was worth it. He didn't leave the bed in disgust and he didn't grunt or glare at me which meant he didn't mind it. That was all I needed. As long as he didn't react negatively to it I was fine.

It didn't bother me that he didn't say it back either. This was Sesshomaru…and to put it blankly…

I would love him forever.

It had taken me a long time to fall asleep, and him to because I fell asleep before he did. We just stood up enjoying each others heat and comfort.

I finally knew that there was no doubt in my mind. Long ago I had asked my mother, "How do you know when you're in love?" and she simply answered me this-

**You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep, because reality is finally better than your dreams.**

I finally understood. She was absolutely right.

* * *

It took me a long time, but I fell asleep and when I awoke, I was delighted to see my lovely Sesshomaru still beside me. I would always remember this day. Finally I had woken up before he did this time.

I now had the courage I didn't have back then. I played with the strands of his hair over his face and pushed them back. His features were so fair, and his body so solid.

I admired him for over an hour. I would stay like this until he woke up.

"How long do you intend to keep this up?"

When he spoke, he nearly scared me half to death as I fell off the bed flabbergasted.

"You were awake this whole time?!" The blush had crept into my face.

He smirked and it just made him look even more admirable to look at. He sat up to look at me, his flawless hair pouring over his muscular chest.

"No, I was awake for two hours." I wanted to vanish. This was just a little embarrassing.

"Ugh! You're such a jerk!"

I crawled away like a shameless puppy. I was so close to reaching the door when he stood before me.

"Get up miko."

"Well I guess you woke up on the wrong side of the bed-and when did we go back to the "miko" thing again?"

"Get up now." He said more sternly. What was his problem? After all this time did he still think he could order me around?

"I don't think so." I crawled away trying to make it to the bathroom when he yanked me up.

"Just don't do it Kagome. I mean it."

I was so confused. "But why?"

He didn't answer me, he just gave me a look…which was quite unfamiliar…oh no…WAIT! I knew that look…it was the look of when any child would ask their parents, "Where do babies come from?"

I flushed an even deeper red than before. Duh Kagome! He's a **dog** demon and dogs…do-certain stuff that way…

He turned his focus away from mine and I swore I could see a slight tint of crimson on his cheeks.

"Do I make myself clear?"

I nodded. "I'm sorry my Lord-I wasn't thinking…"

* * *

After the escapade in the morning, I heard some good and bad news from Sango. The good news was Miroku was back, but the bad news was that Inuyasha had returned with him. Why did it seem like once everything was going good-something bad had to happen afterwards?

Sesshomaru had smelled him which meant I didn't have to tell him. I could tell he was angry that he was back…and it saddened me that he still hadn't changed his mind about killing Inuyasha…

I didn't want Sesshomaru getting hurt…and what if Inuyasha succeeds in cutting his arm off completely this time? I didn't want to think about the possibility.

I went over to visit Sango and Miroku while Sesshomaru schemed some more now that Inuyasha returned.

"Sango only three more months and our child will be born. I cannot wait to see him."

"Or her." She giggled and they held each other in a long squeeze.

"My, your belly seems pretty large Sango-oof." The hiraikotsu had made perfect contact with his head.

I guess he still hadn't changed which was good.

"So how are things going?"" They are very good Kagome…the baby is fine and now that Miroku is back, everything will be much better."

I frowned. "Inuyasha is back…"

Both of them nodded solemnly. "Maybe he can do something about all the food he left us which was rotten by the way and help feed his people."

"We know you're angry Kagome, but please, Inuyasha has been looking forward to seeing you and you must not be frustrated-Only for the time being at least until he is dethroned."

I rolled my eyes. I definitely did not look forward to seeing him. I dreaded his return.

* * *

Soon after Miroku had stated that, soldiers had come looking for me to meet up with Inuyasha and they escorted me to the palace. I began to worry. What if Rin told him of what happened? What lies or even truth would she tell him?

I entered his chambers to see him looking out his window.

"Kagome…I missed you."

I said nothing to him. What was I going to say? That I missed him too when I didn't?

"Why do you not lighten at the sight of me? Did you wish me dead? Did you secretly yearn for me not to return again?"

"It's not that my Lord…it's just-""Just what? My brother?"

So Rin did tell him already.

"My Lord, you left your people to starve-""I left food for my people-""Rotten food Inuyasha!"

He frowned. "I will see to it right away."

'_Yeah sure…'_

In seconds he stood only centimeters away from me. "Kagome-I want to hear you say it. I don't want to believe Rin, I want to hear it from you."

"What?"

"Have you slept with my brother?"

This was really starting to piss me off. Everyone and their mother thought that Sesshomaru and I were sleeping together-I mean we were but we weren't having…sex! The very thought made me embarrassed and self conscious. I could understand if it was true but it wasn't!

"I am not sleeping with him my Lord."

He sniffed and immediately smiled.

"I can still smell your innocence. It's still there."

At least _**someone**_ knew we weren't being sexually active.

He put his hands on my shoulders and stared into my eyes. "Kagome…lay with me tonight." "Why don't you lay with Rin tonight? She probably misses you."

Surprisingly he wasn't throttling me. "Come now Kagome, I feel no pleasure from it-""But you did it more than once right?" Wow I was really sharp with him.

I could see his patience running thin. Actually he was never patient to begin with…

"Kagome…please lay with me." "I-…I don't love you anymore Inuyasha…" I was beginning to ask myself who I was and what happened to the real Kagome. Someone had taken over my brain just for today-or maybe it was finally time I revealed the truth to him…more so myself.

His eyes widened in hurt and shock. "You're lying." "I'm not I can assure you." He smelled me and growled.

"So what Rin said is true! You may not be sleeping with him, but you…you love him!" his grip constricted me.

"Inuyasha…you're hurting me…"

"Of all people Kagome, my brother?! How could you betray me?!"

"What are you talking about?! We were never together?!"

"Why else would you not love me?! Sesshomaru plagued your mind! He turned the only woman I ever loved against me!" he squeezed and I felt his nails dig into my skin.

"Inuyasha…stop." I whimpered but his emotions were in control now. I could not reach him.

"I will not go on without you Kagome. I told you that from the beginning and I will say it to the end. I refuse. What must I do to gain your love again?" he softened a bit and I stiffened.

"Inuyasha…please…there is nothing you can do-I'm sorry." He let me go-his face was grief stricken. He blinked a lot which meant he was pretty angry.

"So he has captured your heart I see…" I shook my head. "Stop Inuyasha-""You think you know him Kagome?" His energy flared. "Think again…he could not love anyone. He is incapable of loving-he is a cold bastard. On the other hand I could love you…I could give you anything and everything you want."

"Inuyasha we were together and we broke up. We had our chance and it was over. We are finished-we have been finished. I will not go back to you Inuyasha I told you this already."

He turned away from me and his shoulders slumped.

"I still love you…I will always love you…please stay…"

If he had said that before I met Sesshomaru, I would've jumped into his arms in a heartbeat…but not this time-not ever.

"I'm…really sorry…I just can't Inuyasha…" I felt terrible, but it had to be done. I meant everything I said. I no longer loved him; I was in love with Sesshomaru, even if he didn't love me back, I was in love with only Sesshomaru.

Instantly his fist met my stomach and I crouched over in pain. It was excruciating.

"What…did you say?"

I coughed and heaved on the floor, tasting the blood in my mouth. He lifted me up into his arms and I thrashed.

"Kagome…relax." He simply soothed but I bit his arm and he dropped me in pain.

"Kagome what the hell are you doing?!" he shouted as I ran through the double doors. I felt him grab my ankle as I fell, face first into the tile floor. I groaned as my head throbbed.

"Kagome?" he laughed manically and it made me want to cry. I knew that tone in his voice…that tone…of pure evil.

* * *

Flashback

"Kagome?" I presented myself to him, if I didn't the beating would only be worse. I knew exactly what was going to happen. It was time.

A memory of when he would call my name and I wouldn't be scared played in my mind.

I remember his drastic change like it was yesterday…Hojo and I were just friends, but one day Hojo had kissed me and before I could pull away or push him off and tell him that there as someone else, Inuyasha killed him…and I shrieked in horror. That was the also the first day I was beaten…and he threw the flowers he had gotten me in my face. I wanted to die that day…

Not only that, but his drastic change had to do with his demon side. That part of him began to overpower his human side and he couldn't control it yet. His father was thinking of way to succumb it-but apparently it wasn't fast enough because he had already killed many people…

"Why do I smell a male scent on you?" I put my head down. "I bumped into someone by accident when I was at the market." He rushed toward me and struck me down to my knees. "Don't lie to me Kagome! I want to know the truth!" He hit me in my face and I fell to the floor. He stomped on my shoulder and I sobbed in anguish.

"I allowed you to go outside today because you were being good Kagome! I thought you would be grateful considering you haven't gone out since your last escape attempt four months ago! You were doing everything I wanted and so I thought! This is how you repay me?! By touching the first guy you see out there?!" His eyes were menacing and all I could do was lay there.

I gave up pleading for him to stop a long time ago. Why do I tell him the truth when he doesn't even believe me? He never stopped until he was finished.

He lifted me up by my hair and snarled.

"How many times must I beat you until you obey me?"

The tears fell from my eyes and dripped from my chin.

"I have to beat it into your head don't I?" I cried harder and he dropped me to the floor.

"Kagome…I love you…why do you make me do this to you? I don't want to hurt you-but you insist on being disloyal to me…"

My fingers curled into fists. I trembled from both fury and depression. I couldn't take him anymore. This was the last straw. What did I have to do to stop loving him so everything would be much easier?

"Inuyasha…I love you too." He stood over me and told me to rise.

When I did as I was told, he stared long and hard at my face. "I want children."

This was something new. Now I panicked more than ever. This was so random!

"I want to have four children, and you will be there mother."

It was definitely time to leave him. It just made me think, how would he treat our kids? Would he beat them like he beats me? There was no way I was going to allow that.

It came to my attention that I could not spend the rest of my life with him-no matter how much I loved him. I did want children in the future, but I could not have him as their father. As much as it killed me inside to not be with him and leave him…I chose my children over him.

"Will you have them?" he asked whispering in my ear, while his hands roamed my body. His touch was beginning to make me shiver in pleasure and fear. Though he had wanted to do it many times…he wouldn't because he wanted to wait until the right time which was fine with me.

"I will have them for you Inuyasha."

I never lied to Inuyasha, this was my first time. I had to-in order to escape him. I had a plan; this was different from all my other escape attempts. I wanted to see my mother…and my brother…I could only see them once every three months but lately the visits have been getting lesser and lesser.

Every time I went my mother looked ill and my brother's smile was gone. How were they doing now? They all smiled when I was there, but they looked so down…It tore me up to see them but it had kept me going.

Now that my visits were restricted…my spirit had began to die even more. It wasn't enough that Inuyasha hadn't beaten my soul, but now the only things that had kept it alive were my family…

'_Momma, Souta…I'm coming.'_

The time for my plan had come and I had to admit, I was thinking of saving it for another time, but that was just the fear talking. I had to do this. If I didn't…I would never try again. I had to at least try one more time.

Inuyasha had always slept beside me with his arms wrapped around me. Luckily he was a hard sleeper. I slipped through his arms, and took out the beads of subjugation. My mothers' friend had given it to her, and so she gave them to me from my last visit. She had told me to say a command once it was on, but I didn't think of it yet. I just wanted to get the hell out of here.

When I put the necklace on him I got up to leave and my eyes welled up. This was it…this was the last time. I loved him even still…after all the beatings I still loved him…but I was near death so many times…I had to.

I kept telling myself I had to I had to I had to. My mind was telling me to leave-but my body wasn't. I wanted to kiss him one last time…

I mentally screamed at myself. Get out of there Kagome! Get out before he wakes up! Now is your chance!

I opened the door…and when I slipped through the tiniest crack I made, I looked one last time before closing the door…

'_I love you.'_

I walked up the stairs from my "home" and this time I had always gotten caught by guards but not this time! I memorized where they were and their posts and so I avoided them this time.

There I was…staring at my freedom before me. No one was around and the doors were right there…I was actually leaving…by myself…without Inuyasha.

I opened the door and smelled the fresh air. How I missed the outside so much!

I took one step and nothing happened. I was free…

Took another step out and I was completely out of the palace. This is what it felt like…to be outside on your own…

I was so excited I began to run home when-

I saw shimmering gold eyes in the dark. My mouth dropped and my eyes bulged out of my head.

"Kagome?"

That unmistakable tone…Inuyasha was more than angry, he was infuriated! This beating was going to be my worst and my body glued me to my spot in fear. My mentality was screaming at me to move but I just stood there scared for my life.

"Kagome did you really think you could escape me?!" he roared and I cringed at the sound of his booming voice. He stepped into the light and walked toward me casually.

"You belong home with me…if you come back now, my hits won't be as bad…" He was still quite a distance-but I could not run from him…he would catch me in only a minute…

"N-no!" I screamed. He froze and his eyes turned red. The marks of the demon he turned into so many times meant that the beating would be near death…no…not again…I couldn't go back now that Mother and Souta were so close!

"Kagome you disobeyed me for the last time-when you return home you will not go anywhere without my supervision!"

His nails grew longer and sharper and now he was running toward me with lightening speed. He was getting closer and closer and I was getting nowhere. I simply stood there in utter disbelief and too frightened for my life to even breathe.

'_The command Kagome, say the command!' _

I had no idea what to say when all I blurted out was…

"S-s-sit boy!"

He plunged to the ground instantly at my feet and I smiled-ecstatic that it actually worked. His eyes were no longer red along with the marks and his reaping nails. Now that my legs seemed to work again…I backed away slowly and began to run…when I heard him call to me…

"Kagome…please…"

I receded and looked back. His eyes were watery…and his hand reached out to me…how I wanted to hold him in my arms and tell him how much I love him…

"Goodbye Inuyasha…"

As I ran his cries echoed through the night.

"Kagome what are you doing?!"

I ran faster.

"Kagome I love you! Don't do this to me!"

I closed my eyes and ran even faster trying to drain him out.

"_**KAGOME!!**_"

End Flashback

* * *

A/N-So how was it? Sorry this chapter was so long and that it took long to make...I was going through some tough times but I'm better now! lol so any advice? Any tips? Let me know guys I love hearing your opinions and I always enjoy constructive criticism. Anyways this story is coming to an end soon...I know it seems short but remember I made this from a movie so it wouldnt be that long but I did extend it a little for you guys!

I hope you guys like this chapter-I was pretty nervous making it and I hope you understand it a little better now...sorry if I didnt make anything clear if you have any questions just ask ok? Until next time my readers! Love you all!

Angel Of Gods Grace


	4. Joining of Souls

Wow guys SOOO sorry for the longest wait in history ever! I will never make you guys wait this long AGAIN! Ugh! Authors Oath!

Many things were going on.

boyfriend issues (grrr)

Writers block like mad!

Busy Busy Busy! Working and Babysitting three girls is kinda tougher than I thought! And getting into college now whoa gives me a headache thinking about it!

Anyway, much more stuff happened but man! I finally finished this chapter and the next one just needs touch ups unless I plan to change it AGAIN.

Thank you for the reviews guys! : ) they put the biggest smile on my face!

Kagomes pup- Omg I just love when people say that I got fluffy down pretty good because that's all I was worrying about with this story and continue to fret about it everytime I'm in the process of writing about or with him! I don't want to make him OOC cause everyone loves cold hearted Sesshy! (Don't know why but I do too lol)

Ihaveprobs-I was worried about the writing style too. I try my best to make the writing as best as I can so you guys can understand and feel like your in the moment. I like descriptive writing a lot so thank you!

PinkSlyterin- You reviewed for all of my chapters! You ROCK! Lol but yeah I had to have rin told I just had to put that in there. I will never abandon a story so I will continue of course cuz I don't want to die…cuz at times I want to hunt ppl down who don't finish there stories. Oh and about Sesshomaru making Inuyasha suffer…you'll see.

Ice-Cold-Bunni- That means a lot to me! I want people to feel the emotion that the characters feel-that's why I put a lot of description in it. I thought ppl wouldn't like it that way but you said otherwise thanks!

Sesshy-805-I'm glad you feel that way! I want ppl to stay liking it, not that it gets worse and worse lol. That would crush me : ( but sorry I made you guys wait so looong! I will never do that again! Authors Oath! Btw…you will find out soon enough.

Starlight – Wild Koneko- It kinda is intense, but I hope it isn't too intense to make you uncomfortable? And you can be the judge of how bad the thing is muhahaha.

Sunkissedkelsey-Thanks! But the storyline isn't all mine so I cant take all the credit. I did mix it around but the idea came from a movie, of course its not exactly like the movie but I'm glad you like it! Woo hoo! That makes me feel all fuzzy!

If I missed anyone plz let me know! If I did...

:Kowtow:

A/N: Hey guys before you read, the story gets a little more darker and a little more angst, so if Sesshomaru might act out of character…love does that to you right?

Btw, if you're wondering why I changed it to M…it's because there's a lemon in here. I did it to be safe. I cant stand when authors get their story removed because it was too "explicit" or something. Grrr. but yeah this is my very first lemon AHHH! I cant say too much but if there is any reader who does NOT want to read it I will warn you don't worry.

**Disclaimer**: Inuyasha aint mine. Not one thing! But I love my Inuyasha blankie! It keeps me warm from my evil AC!

* * *

Previously,

"Kagome…please…"

I receded and looked back. His eyes were watery…and his hand reached out to me…how I wanted to hold him in my arms and tell him how much I love him…

"Goodbye Inuyasha…"

As I ran his cries echoed through the night.

"Kagome what are you doing?!"

I ran faster.

"Kagome I love you! Don't do this to me!"

I closed my eyes and ran even faster trying to drain him out.

"_**KAGOME!!**_"

End Flashback

Chapter 3

Joining of Souls

That had been so long ago…

Sure he changed a bit, now that he was in control of it more…but the power had gotten to him-and changed him into something even worse…That was not the Inuyasha I had fallen in love with. He is long gone-along with my love for him…forever.

Reality had come back again as I heard him call out my name.

"Kagome…you escaped me last time…but never again!"

I forced myself to get up from his hold on me, but he was so powerful. "Inuyasha get off of me!" I screamed. "no." he boldly alleged. If there was one thing about Inuyasha he always had-it was his stubbornness. He never gave up.

There was only one thing to do. "Inuyasha you give me no choice-"His eyes widened. "Kagome don't do it-"

"Sit boy!"

He crashed to the ground instantly while I escaped from his terrifying grasp.

"Kagome…"

The sweet tone in his voice made me stop. I turned to look and déjà vu hit me…hard.

"Don't do this…not like this…"

"Inuyasha…I-…" I had no idea what to say. What _could_ I say?

His bangs fell over his eyes…and there loomed a dark aura around me.

"Please Kagome…could we at least just talk about this?" This was something new. Inuyasha was **never** good with words-at all. I was hesitant of course.

"I don't know Inuyasha…I will think about it." It didn't take me long for me to come up with my answer. I would talk to him-only because I wanted to hear what he had to say.

I cursed myself and him…no matter what he did, I would always forgive him, and I would always give him a chance to redeem himself. What was I thinking?

"Tomorrow…we will talk, and no one is to know about it." He nodded in agreement as I bolted home.

* * *

I burst open the doors to my home and immediately ran upstairs to wash his scent off of me when…

_**Smack**_

I felt like I ran into a brick wall…but I should've known it was Sesshomaru-sama.

His eyebrow rose up in curiosity. "What are you doing?"

I smiled sheepishly but kept running. "Longstory! GottotakeshowerBYE!"

I washed myself profusely and scrubbed until my skin was red. I didn't want Sesshomaru thinking that something happened and set him off to kill Inuyasha. That was definitely not what I needed…

But would I tell him that I agreed to meet Inuyasha tomorrow? Would I tell him the truth or would I hide it from him?

I instantly regretted giving a chance to Inuyasha in the first place. He would probably hurt me, or worse, hurt Sesshomaru. He had an idea about us…technically there was no "us" in the first place, but he had an idea that I had feelings for his brother.

When I was finished, I dried myself hurriedly and stumbled into my clothes.

I was beyond nervous…I didn't want to lie to Sesshomaru. What if he asked? What if…Oh no…Sangos curse is rubbing off on me!

After my bath, Sesshomaru accompanied me the entire day. I was so ashamed at how good of a liar and pretender I was. It was sad. Sesshomaru didn't ask any questions or didn't even have any suspicion at all.

Maybe he was just as mind boggled as I was about our kiss or maybe he was too busy thinking about his hands surrounding his half brothers throat. Yeah…that was probably it.

* * *

When the stars came out we went back home and when I entered my room he growled at me.

"You may be able to fool others with your façade, but not me. I gave you the chance to tell me all day and before this night is over you will tell me what Inuyasha's scent was doing all over you."

So he did know…but he chose to wait for me to tell him myself. I felt even more horrible than when I didn't tell him. It just showed how untrustworthy I was.

My back was towards him. I couldn't face him now…after he just figured it out for himself that I was keeping a secret from him. I didn't lie really-I just hid the truth…ok well that's practically the same but-the reason why I didn't tell him was because I was scared of what he was going to say or do. Now was the moment of truth.

"Sesshomaru-sama…forgive me." I murmured, still hesitant.

"Stop hesitating." He knew me like a book.

"Soldiers had escorted me to the palace. I met Inuyasha there waiting for me in his chambers and-"

The next thing I knew I was being pinned against the wall. His hands crushing my wrists against the wall which was excruciating.

"Kagome if you desire my brother tell me right now." His tone was menacing and bitter, but I knew he was just paranoid of what I was doing with his brother.

I admit he knew me like a book, but I didn't even have to read the book like he did. I merely need a glance to know.

I smiled.

"My Lord…I no longer desire him." He stared long and hard into my eyes, before letting out a sigh and allowing me to continue.

"When I had met Inuyasha in his room, he confessed his love for me, but I told him that I didn't love him anymore in that way. Yes I love him, but I'm not **in** love with him."

He was just as stunned as I was to say the least at what I had said.

"When I wanted to leave he tried to stop me but he couldn't. He asked if I could speak with him and I told him tomorrow I would just to hear him out-nothing else."

He said nothing and looked out my window.

"He has an idea that I…have feelings for you-but he doesn't know you live with me so that's good."

"Now is the time to rest."

I was confused at his sudden randomness to sleep. Maybe he just didn't want to be awake right now or maybe he just did it to shut me up…?

* * *

I awoke, feeling absolutely refreshed.

Opening my eyes I saw Lord Sesshomaru awake, but with his eyes closed.

I knew he was awake **this** time!

I began to leave the bed when I was pulled right back into his hold.

"My Lord! I need to get up and be dressed!"

"I require your warmth a little longer."

My heart jumped in excitement. I truly cherished him more than anyone-anything.

He squeezed me closer to him and I returned it, taking his scent in. He always smelled so good!

He was being so…loving today. What was the catch? Usually he is never like this at all. Now he wanted to hold me more and cuddle, and just be Sesshomaru who is the cutest thing in the world…

Ok maybe I was a little obsessive plus possessive which equaled scary stalker but at least his feelings were returned…and it wasn't unrequited love.

Our bodies entwined with one another, and his tight embrace made me feel so loved. He was being so affectionate. Kissing my forehead and brushing my hair out of my face and playing with it. His fingertips grazing my cheeks which sent blood streaming to my face. How adorable could he be?!

This was a new side I had never seen. My Lord, Sesshomaru, affectionate? This had been what I wanted but why did I feel like there was something behind it?

I then sighed, realizing that he was distracting me from meeting Inuyasha.

I attempted once more to leave the bed when he pulled me back in.

"Sesshomaru-sama…please don't worry."

I tried my hardest to soothe him but something so different was etched on his soft features.

"I don't want you to go."

The words flowed right out as simple as he could say it. It wasn't a demand for once; it was more of me acknowledging what he thought about it. He was always straight and to the point which I loved.

I frowned inside, but I smiled on the outside as to not worry him.

"My Lord…I will be fine, and besides, it will only be for a short while. I will be back before you know it."

I hurriedly dressed as he eyed me the entire time. "It won't take long, I promise. I will be back my Lord. To make you feel better, if you hear my whistle, that means I need you ok?" he agreed, I was glad to see him relaxed a bit.

With that said I left leaving him with those puppy eyes. Kami, how I wanted to run back in there and tell him how much I loved him but it would only take a short while. I just wanted to get this over and done with.

* * *

When I had entered the palace and into Inuyashas chambers, he was nowhere to be found. This was odd…

I didn't want to go snooping around but I just wanted to see if he was here.

I walked quietly in his room looking for him when-

"Looking for me?"

I nearly jumped out of my skin as I turned to see Inuyasha and his menacing glare. "I am not pleased Kagome…you disappoint me."

"What are you talking about?"

His eyes glowed. "I can smell his scent on you-it's everywhere, but I can still smell your innocence. How is this?" My nails dug into my skin with fury. I was getting fed up with everyone about that now.

"Inuyasha you-" but I was cut off abruptly with my head meeting the wall behind me with great force. My skull was ringing and cried out in pain. I opened my eyes to see the red rubies I had always feared.

He trapped me between his arms like steel bars. He breathed heavily just staring at me.

His breathing pace slowed down a bit and his eyes became their usual gold. "Kagome…I don't like when people touch my things…especially you. I'm not a jealous person…It's just…" merely thinking of the thought made his blood boil. His power encircled me.

So many memories came back to me. I felt myself shaking horrifically.

He held me in his arms.

"Don't be frightened…I'm here."

That's exactly why I was terrified to begin with. What should I do? I knew I would regret this. Why does hope deceive me time and time again? I'm such an idiot to believe him…

He smiled at me. "Kagome…it will be just like old times now."

I could feel my insides curl and my skin twinge at his words. How could this happen?

"Inuyasha…-"

"I will inform your family that you will not be coming back to visit them for awhile." I hung my head, drowning in my own sorrow. I wanted to get the hell out of here-and as far away from Inuyasha as possible no matter what the costs.

But I would lay low and be "loyal" for now until I came up with a legit plan.

"and tell Sesshomaru that you never want to see him again-that you choose to be my mate now." My eyes widened. How could I tell him such a thing when it wasn't true? Even if it was true how could I? That had to be the worst punishment anyone could give me.

"Do so, and I will dethrone myself. Sesshomaru could have these lands for all I care. On the contrary, if you _**don't**_ tell him, I will kill him without any hesitation-do you understand?"

I couldn't contain the tears cascading down my cheeks. My mind was racing with so many thoughts. Inuyasha would be watching our conversation…

"But Inuyasha…he can most likely sense that I would be lying-""He would believe you. You're a good liar."

If I told Sesshomaru-sama what I was ordered to say…surely he would be hurt, but if I didn't, he would die. Not that I didn't have faith in Lord Sesshomarus skills, but he nearly lost his arm-the next time he could lose his life…

Isn't this what Sesshomaru-sama wanted all along anyways, to become the Lord of these lands? If he gets what he wants, then he should be fine right? That's what my Lord had wanted, the throne. He doesn't need me…

My heart screamed at the reality of my life. He doesn't need me…I was just his information gatherer.

* * *

I unfortunately agreed to my despair, but to Inuyashas delight.

I arranged a meeting with Sesshomaru-sama as Inuyasha hid himself, unsensible.

I twiddled my fingers. I was nervous, frantic, and miserable. What was I going to say? I felt like throwing up. My breathing pace was off and beads of sweat formed above my brow.

I felt like I was having a heart attack.

My heart was beating so loud I thought everyone in the kingdom could hear it.

"What's wrong?"

I didn't even notice he showed up. I couldn't even look at him. I was so ashamed and I didn't want to see the look on his face when I told him…

"My Lord…I-…I have splendid news."

He was silent which meant for me to continue.

"Inuyasha is surrendering his throne. He no longer desires to be the Lord of the West."

He looked up at the sky. "Are you sure?"

I nodded for confirmation.

"Then why are you forlorn?"

I sighed.

"He is moving away from the Kingdom-and I am accompanying him."

His eyes sparkled and gleamed like fire. His eyebrows furrowed and his stare became unpleasant now. He wanted answers…now-but the answers I would give him would not be right.

"What is the meaning of this?"

"I…"

I didn't want to say it but I…I had to…for Sesshomaru-samas protection.

"I want to be his mate. I still love him, I was mistaken to think I could love another, I only love Inuyasha."

Kami, how my heart shrieked in agony from the lies spilling from my lips.

Sesshomaru turned away from me. I felt as if I was less than nothing. I now felt what Rin had felt-despised by the one you love.

"You got what you wanted my Lord. You are now the Lord of the West-""I should've known."

The tone of his voice made it sound as if he regretted meeting me…trusting me. "Either he is blackmailing you or you really are serious." I held my breath.

I had to think of something fast…to convince him.

"I only used you to tell him of your motives. I was alongside Inuyasha the entire time. I will always love him, and do whatever it takes to please him."

I couldn't see his expression, but I knew I had hit something that I shouldn't have.

"But of course. A whore is only fit for such a half breed."

I wanted to fall to my knees and beg for his forgiveness and tell him that what I said was all lies! That I was doing this only for him!

"Either you get out of my sight, or I will demolish you where you stand."

I did as told with my heart heavier than ever.

When I had traveled far enough that Sesshomaru-sama couldn't detect me, Inuyasha embraced me, spinning me in circles. "I can't believe he fell for it! I knew you could do it! I knew he would believe only you!" The happiness on his face was the exact opposite of what I felt. I wanted to die right then and there.

I thought my Lord would be happy this way but he just seemed angrier than ever. It had to be because of my betrayal, but he would get over it right? I was just someone who assisted him in attaining valuable knowledge right?

* * *

A few weeks had passed since I last saw my Lord. I constantly wondered what he was doing and how well he was. I hadn't tried any escape attempts because where would I go? Now I was miles away from anywhere life resided. I whistled so many times…but he never came…who would want to see someone after what I said anyways?

I had gotten caught by Inuyasha and he beat me for days-just random outbursts of his anger. He screamed at me for trying to contact him and told me that he would never come. Day after day I whistled, and time after time I was beat for it until I truly believed that Sesshomaru would not come.

Inuyasha was beginning to lose his mind. I couldn't help feeling depressed and heartbroken without Sesshomaru and so I ate very little or not at all, I simple stared into space, and never spoke.

Many times Inuyasha wanted to kill me, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He would always complain that I was torturing him when I did absolutely nothing-literally.

He wanted to bed me many times, but he wouldn't do it unless I told him I loved him-when I would obey his every command. Inuyasha was losing his patience with me though, and his advances became more and more forceful. We…did things but it wasn't sex. Afterwards I would scrub myself until I was red all over.

I was slowly slipping into insanity myself. I just couldn't stop thinking of the last words and the last meeting I had with Sesshomaru-sama. The guilt was tearing at my heart.

"Kagome…I am being as patient as I can-but you are giving me no choice!" his voice echoed through the house as I sat there feeling lifeless as usual.

He sharpened his claws and they stopped only an eyelash away from my left eye, but I did not stagger, nor did I flinch. I didn't care what happened to me anymore.

He growled loudly withdrawing his hand and knocking me down to the floor.

"Why won't you look at me?!" he shouted.

I lay on the floor and huddled up in a tiny ball.

"It's my brother isn't it?! Isn't it?!" he was becoming paranoid and demented. He was frequently becoming a demon more and more often. He never went near his sword because he had nothing to fear around here…

The last time I sat him, the necklace almost came off. I only have one more time to use the command to my advantage and I would use it wisely. I would escape eventually…

* * *

As Inuyasha slept with his arms possessively around me, I wiggled my way out of his grasp and looked out the window, gazing at the moon.

Lord Sesshomaru was under the same sky I was.

My heart told me to whistle, in hopes he would come, but my mind new better.

'_Call to him!'_

My mentality screamed.

'_Call to him Kagome!'_

I closed my eyes trying to drain out the hopeful thought.

'_I can't…'_ I told myself.

'_Don't be foolish! He will come this time!'_

I couldn't believe what I was doing, but I made my way out the house and when I was far enough so that Inuyasha was too deep in his slumber to hear, I whistled.

I whistled and whistled but he did not show up. I started to feel numb.

Tears raced down my face as I continued to whistle.

He wasn't coming.

I mean...maybe it wasn't such a good idea to call to him anyways. What if Inuyasha would find him?

I fell to the ground in complete anguish. Of course he wouldn't come. He didn't come all those other times, why would he come now? After all that has happened?

I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs. I didn't want to be with Inuyasha! I didn't love him anymore! I did this to protect Sesshomaru-sama, but now he hates me more than anything! I would rather die than live with that knowledge.

I wanted to see his charming face, I wanted to be in his presence, I wanted to tell him how sorry I am and how much I loved him and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.

I gripped the grass in my hands full with grief.

I took out my small cutting knife, I didn't want to feel like my insides were burning everyday and especially Inuyashas lustful touch.

I held the pointed blade to my wrist..

I looked up at the stars feeling insignificant.

"I'm sorry…Mama, Souta, Father,…Sesshomaru…I can't take the pain anymore..." I felt the sting of the blade rip into my flesh, but only for a slight moment until a quick flash had removed the blade from further injury.

I was shaking to see Inuyasha with an angry expression holding the blade from me in his hand. How bad would this beating be now?

When he stepped into the moonlight I was even more frightened to learn that it wasn't Inuyasha-it was him….it was my Lord…he had come back. All the blood drained out of my face. I probably looked like a ghost. He simply stared at me and I couldn't find myself to look into his eyes.

* * *

After Kagome had said what she was planning with Inuyasha, everything crumbled. What the hell was she thinking? Knowing Kagome she would do something like that to protect someone else, but she would tell me first wouldn't she?

For the past weeks I had heard Kagome whistle almost every single day. When she would miss a day panic overwhelmed my heart, but I would never show it. I wanted to go and hold her in my arms, but that damn oracle told me not to go. No matter what the cost.

No one told me what to do, **no one**-but she was right about the tragedy…Kagome was gone from me. If I went to her, Inuyasha would rape her. The oracle told me this many times when I had tried to save her, but then I stopped myself.

At times I felt like I was making up the whistle in my head randomly during the day-or was it that I couldn't stop hearing that whistle echo through my mind in the night when she would call to me?

After she had stopped for awhile, I presumed she was dead, but I felt somehow she was still alive-barely hanging on.

At least with the whistle I knew she was alive, but now I had no knowledge of that. If she whistled one more time I would go to her despite what the oracle said. I will make it that I stop him from raping her-even though the oracle warned me that it was beyond my power, I would _**make**_ it in my power.

I waited and waited, and still she no longer whistled. I began thinking Inuyasha had killed her in a fit of his rage, but I tried to dismiss those thoughts. Kagome was strong. She would not die by the likes of him. He didn't have it in him to kill her anyways. He "loved" her too much.

* * *

The nights were restless, I wanted to rest, to have the only sanctuary I had left, but Kagome kept coming to my mind, and I found it hard to sleep without her warmth. We shared a bed for so long, it was hard to be alone in one.

I allowed Rin to stay in the palace, and many times she had tried to tempt me.

She had entered my bedroom naked one time, foolishly thinking I was asleep. When she tried to enter my bed, I grabbed her hand and growled, "Leave now if you don't want to live in the streets."

That was the last time she attempted such a thing which satisfied me greatly. The only woman I wanted in my bed was Kagome.

Now I could feel myself sinking into a state where I was no longer myself. I had the throne, I owned the lands, I could have any female I wanted-

Then it dawned on me. That was it.

I couldn't. The only one I wanted was someone I couldn't have-or maybe I could.

I waited for that whistle night after night but nothing. Not even crickets. The silence of the night was tranquil, but eerie. Maybe I should just go anyways. I heard the whistle so many times before that I knew where she was.

* * *

I entered my bed, forcing myself to go to sleep. Finally I would catch some shut eye. Maybe this would relax me a little.

I awoke to my dismay later during the night. I was probably only asleep for a few hours until I heard the whistle! I bolted out of the window when the oracle threw her hands in front of me trying to stop me.

"Do not go to her my Lord! You will lose everything if you do!"

"Silence!" my voice boomed.

She sighed defeated. I ran past her rushing to get there.

I got there only in a matter of seconds and saw a little house. It reeked of Inuaysha.

They were here.

As I drew closer to the house, the scent of Kagome and Inuyasha mixed and made me ill. I looked through the window to see them mating…I hastily turned my head away from them.

I felt weird…lighter…my body was becoming weaker.

I closed my eyes and when I opened them I was met with a fist in my face which sent me flying. I wiped the blood from my mouth seeing Inuyasha half naked which reminded me of what they were doing. My rage increased tenfold.

"You're too late brother." He smiled.

He came at me again with speed unlike I have ever seen. How was he beating me?

I could smell his blood, he was full demon.

We had clashed gripping each others arms in a struggle. He was overpowering me…this couldn't be happening.

"Did you come to save her Sesshomaru? She doesn't want to be saved! She enjoys every single moment with me!"

His laugh haunted me._ 'Was this true…?'_

* * *

I awoke sweating profusely.

'_A damn nightmare…'_

My only sanctuary was gone now. I couldn't even sleep right. I got out of the bed to take a bath. I was trying anything to refresh myself when…

whistle

My eyes widened. This was not a dream.

I dressed in my armor ready for a battle with Inuyasha if one was to happen. When I was ready to leave, I could hear the oracle speaking into my mind.

"Don't go my Lord. Horrible things will happen if you do-""Why do you even care?!" I shouted. She sighed. "I cannot say…but it is my job to look after you-""I can take care of myself foolish woman!"

With that said I did as I pleased.

'_Kagome I'm coming.'_

When I got there I hid among the trees-my eyes fixed on her. It felt like I hadn't seen her in years.

When she took out the blade to hurt herself, I snatched the blade out of her hands and hid among the shadows. I always said I would keep her from harm, even from herself if it were that.

She looked terrified as if she was going to be punished or something.

I stepped into the light and her pulse raced. Was she scared of me now?

I could see the scars and bruises more vividly now that I was closer to her and the radiance of the moon was shining on her skin.

He had beaten her…but-

I sniffed relieved inside that she still had her innocence.

I looked at her for some time until she couldn't hold my gaze. She trembled and the scent of tears filled the air.

"Sesshomaru-sama…" she began, sobbing but trying to speak.

"I thought you would never come…" I felt a sting in my chest at her words. Maybe it was guilt that I hadn't come all those times before.

I examined her carefully.

"Why have you called to me?"

She shrank back, looking fragile and small. "I…wanted to see you."

I scoffed.

"Now that you have seen me I will take my leave-""No please! Sesshomaru-sama I…"

Tears poured from her eyes…those unforgettable azure eyes. They sparkled like the ocean, but her spirit was tarnished. My idiotic half brother was slowly breaking her.

"I wanted to say that I'm sorry…I'm sorry that I lied to you about wanting to be with Inuyasha and everything else I said that day to hurt you. I only did that to protect you-""I do not require anyone to protect me."

"I didn't want you getting hurt Sesshomaru! You almost lost your arm before-it could've been you're life the next time!"

She sobbed some more until I held back no longer.

I embraced her in my arms, feeling her arms wrap around me made me squeeze her closer to me. Honestly, I didn't care that she lied, I was just glad that she was away from Inuyasha at the moment and with me now.

After she was done sobbing we enjoyed the feel of each other for awhile until she looked up at me. "Sesshomaru…"

I looked at her as she whispered, "I love you." She leaned in to kiss me and I felt our lips come into contact. How I missed the sensation she gave me. No one had even come close to the fire she made that surged in me. My hunger for her grew and I kissed her back roughly, not being able to control my actions. Her kisses were exquisite.

She moaned softly, and I took the opportunity to explore what I had missed for so long. My tongue was stronger than hers, and so I dominated her mouth until she relinquished everything to me, allowing me to do **whatever** I desired.

I accomplished my goal quickly, as she desperately yearned for my touch, moaning into my mouth. Her nails scratched into my neck, giving me a rush. I smiled on the inside. I liked being in control, why shouldn't I be?

My hands snaked around her hips and her arms crossed behind my neck deepening our kiss. I was slowly losing my sanity. I knew what I was doing, I knew what I was touching, and I definitely knew where this was going, but what I didn't know was the feeling…it was new to me and sort of confusing.

I had been with other females before, female demons in fact, and I never felt anything, only the relief of my hormones returning to normal again.

So what was happening to me? I thought about it and the feeling was…as if I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.

I wanted to mate her.

That was the feeling! I wanted her to mate with me.

"Sesshomaru-sama, I love you so much." She murmured in between our exchange of kisses.

I paused for a moment, opened my mouth slightly but nothing came out.

'_Tell her. Tell her you love her.'_

I opened my mouth again only to catch my breath. The words were not coming out.

'_Tell her that you want her back in your life, that you are sincerely miserable without her! How you stayed awake for nights thinking about her! Tell her how you feel!'_

My heart would not shut up. I was never the talkative type or an open person. I was not good with situations like these. I had only been in love twice. My first love…well-I didn't even get the chance to tell her before certain events happened, and Kagome…

I don't know how to "express" my feelings to her. I never had to do such things in the first place. I always thought love was for the weak, but now look at me…

I wanted to do it. I wanted to tell her, and for once, I decided to just…take a chance.

"Kagome…"

I placed my right hand on her shoulder and my left hand cupped her face.

'_This was it…' _

…

…

…

"I love you."

Her mesmerizing orbs grew at least a few inches wider, and her breathing became ragged. She said nothing, but her appearance said what she was thinking.

She was completely stunned at my words.

"I love you more than anything. When you're not by my side, my thoughts always come back to you. I can't stand being apart even for a little Kagome. These past weeks have been torturous to me. I want you to come back with me, and share our lives together."

Her breathing was more rapid now and I could feel her trembling beneath my fingertips in anxiety, disbelief and some other emotions that were mixed in there.

I was in just as much disbelief as she was in though. My feelings were speaking for me now, my feelings were bottled up but the bottle had shattered the instant I felt the need to mate her. I tried to shut myself up but it managed to open again.

"I want to mate with you Kagome."

"Um." She mumbled still in shock by hearing what I had to say. She was dumbfounded. It was actually quite cute. Her face turned bright pink, which meant it had to be crimson red if I could see it at night.

I brought my forehead to hers wanting her answer badly, I could feel my body changing, and readying itself to make love to her. "Mate with me Kagome."

She looked away and shivered dramatically. I gently raised her chin to look up at me and déjà vu hit me. Last time she was naked, hopefully if she agreed I would remedy that problem.

At first I thought she was crying, but she was laughing **and** crying.

* * *

I kissed Sesshomaru with a passion I never had. I was so happy to be with him that I forgot about all the bad things that had happened. The contact of our hands and lips sent chills down my spine.

When I told him how I felt, he stopped.

It kind of worried me, I thought I angered him, but after a few short moments of confusion as to why he had that look on his face, he simply said **the words**. Those words caused me to feel like I was dancing on air, but extremely surprised and scared. Sesshomaru-sama never said **the words** to anyone, and he wouldn't lie about it, so what did this mean?

When he continued, I started to feel weak. I thought I was going to collapse any second. He took that phrase more serious than any other person I knew, even more than me-and I would never say it unless I truly felt that way which only meant…that he really did feel that way.

To make even more thoughts race through my head he wanted to mate with me!

So many people thought we were, but now this would be the real thing. What would I do when we started? At this moment I wish I had experience but he threw me off my thoughts again when he came closer to me.

"Mate with me Kagome."

I don't know what caused me to look down at his pants, but I could definitely see a bulge and that frightened me to no end, but I wanted to do it because I love him, not because I was horny or anything like that. I wanted this to be special.

What if I never saw him again? This was my chance to really show him how much I loved him. This is the strongest bond anyone could ever do.

I began to cry, but I laughed as well. I cried because I was so thrilled that he chose me of all people to do this with.

"I want to be your mate Sesshomaru."

**

* * *

**

LEMON WARNING!

A smile was carved on his face and I stood still, savoring the expression. _'He smiled. I made him smile.'_

He kissed me lightly this time…his lips were sooo soft.

Without my knowledge, he swiped a single claw down my back and I felt the chill of the night breeze on my now revealing flesh. My shirt had fell to the ground leaving me topless.

Even though he had seen me before, it was still a little embarrassing.

He still kept his lips in contact with mine, maybe he did it so I wouldn't feel awkward taking off my clothes…maybe I should give up trying to understand him for once?

He broke away to take off his armor and shirt leaving his chest bare.

How I missed sleeping next to him at night…he wasn't even flexing and it looked like he was. He was so perfect I couldn't even describe it. He was really something to look at.

My hands scrambled to touch his chest, I hadn't felt it in so long.

He stood there while my fingertips brushed up his torso. I immediately wanted more of him. I wanted to discover all of him and everything.

With one claw, he scratched straight down my shorts gently, as the material ripped in half and fell to both sides, it revealed my bottom half.

I was completely naked, and felt self-conscious that he grazed me down _there_ in the process.

I wanted to cover up but he grabbed my hands swiftly and placed them on his hips.

He was the expert around here, so I did as I was told, but then my mind took a blank.

I felt his hands over mine, as he pushed my hands down lightly, to slide his pants off looking straight into my eyes. I only had to push them over his hips until they plopped to the ground.

Like any other person in my situation, I couldn't help but look and I gaped at it. I didn't mean to, but I did and for some reason I couldn't turn away. All my mind had to say was, _'I…I have to get ON that thing?!'_

He smirked, letting me take him in, but I knew he was scanning my body too, but if this is what it took to gaze upon his bare body, then I would be more than happy to be naked everyday.

He approached me and I shrank back like a frightened child, but stood my ground. It was just too much to take in. He confessed his love for me, asked to mate with me, and now were both naked while he's towering over me along with his "friend".

He pulled me in closer and held me soothingly.

He played with my hair and I instantly relaxed. My hands reacted on their own accord, caressing his back warmly on his strong muscles. His silky hair cascaded down his back and I ran my fingers through it.

Little did I know that his "friend" was growing which I thought couldn't be possible and I felt it touching my stomach. I looked up at him and backed away surprised, but he caught me, snatching me into his embrace and crashing his lips onto mine.

The way he kissed me, the way he touched me, made me feel so loved. He licked at my lips to enter and I obeyed while he plunged in to taste me.

I pulled him in deepening the kiss to his surprise which gave me the opportunity to taste him back, and he was…so…sweet. Our hands were all over the place, grasping each other tightly. I was eager to explore his body.

I felt him lift me up and softly place me on top of his clothes. They felt like blankets.

* * *

She was extremely self conscious and nervous. By the time both of us were naked, my inner beast was starting to lose control. Seeing her naked again was…completely exhilarating. I couldn't help searching every crevice and curve on her voluptuous figure. Her perfect shape was incomprehensible.

It was obvious that she was overwhelmed, and so I pulled her closer to me to try and relax her. I succeeded in doing so until her hands roamed my back. The simple interaction aroused me immensely.

I missed her more than I possibly imagined.

She was stunned that I was touching her _there_ and so she tried to escape me, but I was not allowing her to. I seized her wrist and our lips collided.

She deepened our kiss taking me off guard.

'_Take her!'_ My body ordered.

Now was the time.

I laid her lightly on my clothes. Her heart rate increased, she knew what was coming.

I positioned myself over her and she let out a deep breath.

Her fingers grazed my cheek. I gave her my full attention, her eyes revealing how scared she was. I had to ask her.

"Do you want me?"

She paused only slightly.

"I want you more than anything."

I carefully entered her, as she let out a soft gasp. She closed her eyes tightly, and let out a whimper quietly. She bit her lower lip to hush herself.

I halted.

She looked at me again teary-eyed. "I'm ok."

I slowly entered her fully, her walls tensed on me. I felt constricted, but it was the way I liked it.

I didn't move until I was sure of her confirmation. She grabbed my shoulders, and moved in a rhythm.

She made the first move, and I followed along with her…

But I wasn't a follower. That would change soon she got comfortable.

She would wince in pain at first, but then her muscles began to relax. Her breathing pace intensified. I could tell how much she wanted me, and I was going to show her how much I wanted her, needed her.

I started to move faster and now _**she**_ was following me.

I grinned deep down.

Her nails dug into my shoulder blades, and I growled from the sensation it gave me.

The demon in me made me go faster and faster, I just couldn't get enough of her. I felt our souls combining, connecting to each other. The feeling was unreal.

She grabbed me closer to her and held onto me firmly, gasping for air as both of us sped up.

"I love you." She panted, scratching my back in the process.

"How much do you love me?" I groaned, wanting to know exactly how she felt about me.

"I love you so much." "**How** much?" I asked, as her moans grew louder and louder.

"More than anything."

Her cries were erotic, and sent my energy flaring. I couldn't hold back anymore.

* * *

Feeling him inside was quite painful, considering demons are naturally larger than humans, but I forced myself to deal with it.

For my first time, I felt proud of myself.

When he began to speed up the pace, I felt him hitting something that made me feel something I never felt. I gasped for air, trying not to scream, but it was harder to contain that I thought! I had never been more in love with him than this moment. Our bodies bare, in front of each other, our feelings; everything was out in the open now.

I latched onto his shoulders and scratched. He groaned so I guess my Lord was into that sort of thing. I dug my nails into him and he growled as I brought his body closer to me, feeling his skin on mine. It made me feel so safe.

"I love you." I whispered and he questioned me, "How much do you love me?"

"I love you so much." "**How** much?" he inquired again.

He was really loving this.

"More than anything." I confessed.

He began to go faster and I was no longer in control of the sounds that I made, both from pain and pleasure. My body was quivering from such emotion; I wondered how he was so great at everything.

He sat upright and grabbed my hips, continuing where we left off and not missing a beat. I could see the animosity in his eyes.

"Kagome…" he murmured and I cried out, seeing only him. He was my world.

"I love you." He said softly, lovingly. I almost didn't hear him.

"I love you too." I moaned, arching my back feeling and feeling something overcome me.

I grabbed his hands and he squeezed me hands, returning the gesture.

With one final cry and his last thrust, we came together as one. My mate and I.

His chest rose quickly, but he seemed fine-only a little out of breath. I probably looked like a mess, but now that we had stopped…the pain was kicking in…badly. I was throbbing from the experience.

**

* * *

**

LEMON OVER!

_**It's safe to read now lol.**_

When we had given all we could to each other, I looked at her, and immediately felt remorse. I realized I was too rough on her. The scent of her blood became strong. I cursed myself for hurting her.

I wanted it to be an experience she would love to look back on, not one that was unpleasant. I tried to go as easy as I could, but my hunger for her got the best of me.

I looked down to see blood dripping and on her thighs. I looked at myself and my own part was covered in it. I had cleaned her first and when she had tried to clean me, I clutched her hands in mine to stop her.

If she would touch me there again, I would probably lay her back down and hurt her more than I already have.

"What's wrong?" she asked, her head tilted to the side adorably in confusion.

Could she ever stop being so innocent?

"Kagome, just…don't touch me there."

"That's not fair. You cleaned me-"

"I know."

"So then I should be able to return the favor."

"Kagome you don't understand. If you touch me there you could "spring" it back to life."

Her face burned red and she withdrew slowly.

"Oh…sorry."

I shook my head amused at her purity in not knowing.

When I had finished I stood up and grabbed her hand to bring her up to stand with me. I grabbed my pants and tied the sash around them, and I gave Kagome my kimono seeing as I "unclothed" her.

She tied it around her and smiled at me.

We were bound to one another now. Nothing could separate us. She belonged to me, as I did to her. She was my mate, and I would never leave her. Our souls are entwined for life, and I would always love her no matter.

"Sesshomaru-sama…"

I sensed the worry in her instantly. It flared around her greatly, but I knew what she was to ask me.

"I'm not going anywhere."

Her eyes widened.

"I am taking you back to the palace."

She wrapped her arms around me tightly in thanks, resting her head on my chest.

I placed my arm around her back and looked at the sky.

'_Why did I ever let you leave me?'_

* * *

A few days passed, and not one scent of Inuyasha, or rumor. There was…nothing. I was perplexed by this, but still alert and aware, always prepared just incase he would try to do anything to take her away from me.

Now that Kagome has returned to me, I was determined more than ever to keep her safe.

She was out in the gardens helping to water the plants. No matter how many times I told her that we had servants for such a task and how it made her look like a peasant, she simply chose to ignore my orders and do what she felt like.

I watched her as she clumsily knocked into other servants, falling in the flowerbeds, and spilling water everywhere.

It was most amusing. She made the servants jobs ten times harder than it had to be.

But that was Kagome. She did as she pleased and not even I, Sesshomaru, Lord of the West could order her to do one thing. As much as I tried, she would not listen and so I would try another motive to get her to obey me…

But not anytime soon…

**

* * *

**

A/N-

Ok well I feel so nervous right now about the review I might get…so so very very nervous that this chapter was bad. :Prays that I don't get bad reviews:

**Anyways I hope you guys liked this chapter-I know it's shorter than my others but it's not over yet.**

**I promise I won't ever let you guys wait that long AGAIN too! That was probably torturous to some people! Thousands of apologies! :Kowtows immensely: I really hope you guys R&R! I feel so bad for making you guys wait so long and I hope it wasn't too explicit for some ppl. (I'm a paranoid person. I think I might even have paranoia?) Enough about me, please tell me what you guys think?**

**Thank you so much for reading my story! The next chapter will be longer and won't take as long I promise!**

Angel Of Gods Grace


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